Monday, October 25, 2010

Sherlock 3



I’ve decided. What I’m going to do is cut off their toes. 


You see, I’m pretty sure that submitting the public to an ending like that deserves a certain amount of retaliation. The hard bit is working out something that is suitably horrible and memorable but which doesn’t cause lasting physiological or physical damage which would impair long term writing ability. QED- I’m going to cut off their toes. 


Mr Moffat already owes me one for the finale of Press Gang which caused me lasting physiological damage. That one warrants the removal of a big toe. The final of Sherlock last night wasn’t exactly big toe material. Unlike Press Gang the results aren’t permanent- we only have to wait a year to experience the conclusion. Plus I have a fair amount of confidence that it’ll be worth the wait. However Mr Moffat and Mr Gatisis are being held jointly responsible for the pain that episode caused millions of people. So I’m thinking a middle toe. 


The final episode of the three was, in summery, better than the second but not quite as good as the first. The main problem  was how much was going on. The multi-case format of the episode was potentially genius and it did work, but it was occasionally very confusing. It had the distinct feeling of an episode which was drastically shorter than it had been originally. I think a lot of script hit the floor along the way. 


For example- why did the assassin look like an extra from Lord of the Rings? Did I miss the bit where they explained that? Also the fight in the planetarium (is that even what that place was?) was just a teeny bit confusing and pointless. I think we were supposed to get the supernova clue from the voiceover but I was too busy trying to work out what was going on. The thing about Sherlock is that I don’t actually want to guess what’s going to happen. That’s one of the things I like about it. 


When Sherlock was posting the answer to each case on his blog, it would have been nice to have to text on screen. Partly because it would have been more consistent but mostly because I couldn‘t read it. Maybe it was perfectly clear in high definition digital but not all of us have that luxury. 


There is, however, nothing I love more than a good piece of evil in a deserted swimming pool. Its such a gloriously other wordly location. Are there words to describe Moriarty? I’m not sure there are. The moment when John stepped out was chilling. For a moment there I considered the possibility that he’s done it. I knew that he couldn’t have but the fact that I considered it is impressive. And then I saw the bomb. And the chill went deeper. 


The high light of the episode was Sherlock ripping the bomb off John. By far my favourite script device is unresolved sexual tension. There is nothing quite like it. It now indisputable that sexual tension is what John and Sherlock have going. What is yet to be realised is whether its essentially platonic (that’s right people, platonic sexual tension) or are they…well you know. Last night I decided I really don’t care which it is. They are two very untrusting people who are deeply loyal to each other. And that’s great to watch. 


Lets not talk too much about the ending. I’ve been trying not to put myself through that. I can only say I hope next year comes quickly. And that first episode better be amazing. There are toes hanging in the balance.  

Friday, October 22, 2010

Thursday on Seven


Thursdays are traditionally a television wasteland. There isn’t any decent reason to explain this as far as I can tell but it is undeniably true. As a result I don’t really feel any shame being excited about the new series of Beauty and the Geek.




Thursday-wasteland-channel-flicking was the original reason my brother and I started watching the first series. Anyone who’s now judging my television choices has obviously not watched the show. Beauty and the Geek is that very rare thing- genuinely charming reality television. The characters somehow manage to struggles out of all the stereotype boxes the producers have stuck them in and make us like them as actual people. Despite being, at first glance, clones of the contestants from series one all proved to have distinct personalities.


Plus its laugh out loud funny. Then again, I’m kind of partial to jokes of extreme nerdiness. There are moments that are cringe inducing too. And not in a good way. Why its necessary to film so many scenes in the spa is totally beyond me. Dear producers- stop trying so hard and just let the thing play out.


I have one other problem with the show- elimination. I get that it’s a reality TV essential and that someone has to win but why do we have to loose a couple every week? There wasn’t anyone I wanted to see go. When Marlon was nominated I almost threw something at the TV.


The tension during the tie breaker was almost unbearable. So was Marlon’s face when he won and said, in a quivering voice, “I don’t feel like a winner.” SOMEONE GIVE THE MAN A HUG! I’m fully aware that I was being shamelessly manipulated by television producers. I know they toy with my emotions but sometimes I don’t mind. ‘Cause its kind of fun.


I’d intended to go to bed at this point. Because, you know, sleep is good. Then I saw the ad for 30 Rock. I’d never actually seen 30 Rock. In fact I’m pretty sure I’d never even seen a commercial for it. I know the name well from various lists of “damn good shows that the networks insist on screwing around.” So, like the time I stayed up just to watch the opening credits of Dexter, I decided to forgo sleep for a while longer.


It was worth it. Admittedly I had only a minimal idea what was going on, which is understandable when you come in at the beginning of series 5. But I did laugh. More importantly the characters were endearing enough that I want to get to know them better. I have series plans which involve “half price TV Thursday” at Video Ezy and series one.


I turned the TV off at the end of the credits but not before I caught a glimpse of what was on next. I turned the TV back on for a second to be sure. Yes, it was Scrubs- another famous member of the screwed around club. It took quite a lot of self control to switch the TV off again and go to bed.


The real question is this- with such quality television on their books why is there so much crap on during prime time and, for that matter, the rest of the time? It defies comprehension. But TV is like that sometimes. We can only prey that there is hope is the glistening digital future.


Beauty and the Geek is on Seven at 8:30pm on Thursdays. 30 Rock comes on at something insane like 10:47pm. Actual time is probably subject to network’s person whims.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Sherlock Part 2


I tried extremely hard not to dismiss the second episode out of hand. But even before the credits rolled this wasn’t the masterpiece that part one was. Don’t get me wrong- its was good. But it wasn’t breathtaking.


The opening irritated me. There was something a bit NCIS about the whole thing. I’m not really watching this show for the mystery, I’m watching it for the characters and the dialogue. Then there was the shopping/sword fight montage. It wasn’t until halfway through the episode that I went “Wait a minute. They never explained why Sherlock was having a swordfight with an Arabian man in his apartment. Or what happened to the Arabian man.” I think maybe it was a reference of some kind to the original stories, but if a reference doesn’t make sense to the uninformed observer it should be left out.

There were some great moments in this episode. The leaps of deduction were no less spectacular than before. The scene where Sherlock walked through the financial office bobbing up and down behind patricians was quite hilarious. Sherlock’s flirting with the morgue worker was a well written build up on a relationship that was introduced brilliantly in episode one. I hope they make something of it in the finale. I love the way Sherlock’s sweetness is underscored with indifference and, in turn, is also hiding just the merest hint of something genuine.

In a similar vein, I loved the spray painter. Am I making a stab in the dark or was he supposed to represent Banksy? If anyone would be on first name terms with the world’s most elusive artist it would be Sherlock. I’m going to pretend that this theory is correct. Because I like it.

 But the text messages were missing. The onscreen text wasn’t used to its full advantage. The people I’ve discussed episode one with have all commented on how inspired the text was. So why leave it out in part two? But I think the biggest flaw came during the climax. When Watson’s love interest (see? I can’t even remember her name) was strapped to a chair and facing imminent death by Chinese arrow, I really didn’t care. It was exciting but I wouldn’t have been particularly devastated if she had died. Actually I was slightly disappointed that she didn’t.

Episode two was missing the understated humour, dark undertow and that unmistakable sexiness. Basically what it was missing was Steven Moffat. But, alas, not everyone can write like that. Television would be an amazing place if they could. It’s a great tragedy that we’ll never see another Press Gang. Unfortunately Mr Moffat has realised that single headedly writing scripts of that quantity is insane. Kind of wish he’d remained ignorant.

 One more episode to go. This Sunday 8:30 Channel Nine. The final was written by Mark Gatiss. I have high hopes.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Sherlock



"Are these human eyeballs?!"
"Put those back!"
"They were in the microwave."
"Its an experiment."






There is only one man alive who can put this amount of sex appeal into a psychopath.

From the first moment Sherlock Holmes appears, whipping a dead body with a riding crop, he sucked me totally in. (I actually wonder if that would have been a better point to start the episode before flashing back across to Doctor Watson and "nothing ever happens to me") Sherlock is a character that shouldn't be sexy. He's an amoral bastard. But I, for one, couldn't care less.


Its one of the things I love about Steven Moffat’s writing. You fall utterly head over heals for his character before realising that essentially they are, to quote Sherlock himself, “ a highly functioning sociopath”. There was a moments during Jekyll when Jekyll walked into a hospital, sunglasses firmly on eyes, grinning madly. Slung over his shoulder was a garbage bag containing a man he had just beaten to within an inch of his life. I had to do a serious double take. There was something darkly alluring about this character. Especially in that moment. To do these kinds of things to an audience’s brain takes an enormous amount of skill.


Sherlock was…there aren’t even words to describe how amazing it was. I’m currently staying in a sharehouse in Sydney for a fortnight. I had every intention of keeping my television obsession to a visible minimum while I’m here. I probably shouldn’t have timed my arrival to coincide with Sunday night. When the “coming up next” ad for Sherlock came on the screen I froze, leaning forward. I said, in a slightly hysterical voice-
“I’ve been looking forward to this for like a year.”


This is true. From the first moment the news of ‘A Study in Pink’ appeared on stevenmoffat.net I was giddily excited. And it didn’t let me down in the slightest.


The editing gave us a glimpse into the amazing mind of Sherlock. And that should have been really hard to pull off. The car chase, where Sherlock and Watson ran through the streets after a taxi could have been horribly contrived. The street signs and maps which flashed up could have been corny. Somehow it wasn’t. Same goes for the onscreen text which revealed to us both the thoughts of the characters and the text messages which were vital to character and plot development. Usually a text would have to be revealed through dialogue or cringe inducing voiceover. Instead they melded seamlessly into the breakneck dialogue and action.


I hate to say it but I’ve never read the original stories. I did very nearly but the classic penguins edition today. It is, however, my first day of being away and I’ve vowed not to return home with 17 kilos of books this time. As a result I can’t comment on the expert translation of the story and characters into a modern setting. This was going somewhere…I can’t remember where.


Sherlock is on again tonight and also next Sunday. So I’ll probably come back and rant some more about how good it is then. In the meantime go and set your video recorder or magic awesome box. Get a pad of sticky notes and write “SHERLOCK 8:30” on them. Now stick to everything within reach. Becasue this is unmissable television.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Last Chance to See

Last Chance to See is one those books that I find myself recommending to strangers. There are so many things in it that I love. Douglas Adams himself credits it as his proudest achievement. Whenever I’m involved in a conversation about environmentalism or conservation or animals I inevitably find myself saying-
“You have to read Last Chance to See.”


I was, therefore, rather excited when I saw the ad for the documentary. The program is a few years old and I’ve been wondering if it would ever get around to Australian screens.


Last Chance to See, for those who don’t know, was the book which came out of an expedition author Douglas Adams and ecologist Mark Carwardine undertook in the 80’s. The idea was to travel the globe finding creatures on the very brink of extinction. Twenty years later Steven Fry and Mark Carwardine revisited the places and the animals that the original work covered. The reason Steven Fry features in that sentence (and you really should know this part of the story) is that Douglas Adams died tragically and suddenly in 2001.


Last night they travelled to the Amazon to find a manatee. Before I say anything else can I say I enjoyed the whole thing immensely. I shall be sitting down religiously to watch the remaining episodes play out. It was sweet and beautiful and, once or twice, even laugh out loud funny. Plus I have a genuine interest in what has happened to the creatures the book made me fall in love with.


But there is one problem with the show, and that is the overhanging but.
At one point Mark Carwardine put a satellite phone to his ear, deep in the Amazonian jungle.
“Steven?” he said as it was answered.
My brain jarred painfully. I had been fully expecting him to say “Douglas.”


Steven Fry lived in Douglas Adams’ house while he was exploring the world on the original adventure. Its only fitting that he should be involved in the revisiting…as a guest appearance, wishing them luck at the airport. We all love Steven Fry BUT he isn’t Douglas Adams.


There is a sense that everyone, even Mr Fry himself, feels this way. It’s a bit like making a movie adaptation of a novel but changing the main character. It should be said that Steven Fry is the only person to do this job. He is the perfect, and only, candidate to replace Douglas Adams. Its just so zarking, painfully unfair that anyone needs to replace him at all.


It is a mark of Douglas Adams’ greatness that we spend an hour wishing STEVEN FRY was someone else. Even more remarkable was the way I keep imposing a different character on this, usually quite adequate, personality. It will be interesting to see how, and if, this diminishes as the series progresses.


I’m going to tell people they should watch this show. I will recommend it to strangers. But I don’t quite think I’ll be able to do so without also saying-
“And you should read the book. Its amazing.”

Last Chance to See is on the ABC, Sunday nights at 7:30.