tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17494001841258762392024-03-14T04:23:18.365+11:00A Beginners Guide to Free to Air TVRamblings, rants and reviews from a TV addictAlexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.comBlogger57125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-67949043501180335022013-07-23T12:16:00.000+10:002013-07-23T12:16:12.922+10:00Hank Green on Adam Hills Tonight<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i>A couple of weeks ago Hank Green was interviewed on Adam Hills Tonight. The interview made me feel uncomfortable for a number of reasons. Below is an email I've sent to the ABC about it. My friend Lizzy suggested I also share it here, so here it is.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">To whom it may concern,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I am writing in regard to the interview with Hank Green
which aired on Adam Hills Tonight on the 3<sup>rd</sup> of July. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Firstly, I’d like to say that I enjoy the show. I think it’s
been a great platform for issues and a showcase of local and international
talent. Often the questions which guests are asked are the right ones and
interesting and thought-provoking answers are the result.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">It is because of this that I was extremely disappointed by
your treatment of John and Hank Green and the community which is Nerdfighteria.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I am proud to call myself a Nerdfighter but I didn’t relate
at all to your portrayal of the community. It seemed like shallow fan-service
(and pretty inadequate fan-service at that) which pivoted on the mockery of
nerds. I though your treatment of Hank and John Green was confusing and
disrespectful. Their achievements were barely mentioned and, when they were,
they were done so flippantly and with disregard. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Let me tell you what the Green brothers mean to me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I understand the world better because of them. That’s what
they do: they encourage empowerment through knowledge. They present complicated
issues in a clear and clever way that makes you want to go out and learn more. Aside
from their main channel, which regularly tackles issues of world politics,
sociology and global debate, they make and produce a number of educational
channels. These deal with, among other things, world history, biology and sex
education. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Being a nerdfighter is about making the world a better place.
That’s what DFTBA means; it is never forgetting that you can be awesome, in the
face of all the terrible things in the world. By arming ourselves with
knowledge, confidence and community we can tackle the seemingly insurmountable
terrors of the modern world. Nothing is hopeless.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">The vlogbrothers have raised a staggering amount of money
for charity, both through the annual Project for Awesome and through other
work. The Nerdfighter group on Kiva has lent well over a million dollars to
business owners in the developing world. And that’s just the tip of the
iceberg. This is a community that has made a tangible and real difference to
the world. The vlogbrothers encourage their community to care about the world
around them and to try and make a difference when they think that something
could be better. We’re always being told that a single person can change the
world but I don’t think I really believed that before I discovered John and
Hank.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Your portrayal of these brothers didn’t even come close to
conveying the enormity of what it is they do. Hank Green is an entrepreneur, at
the forefront of the digital landscape. He is genuinely and honestly trying to
solve some of the problems that the digital world presents. As a young person
working in the arts, I can’t tell you how important it is to know that someone
is thinking about these problems. Hank gives me hope that one day there will be
solutions. One day we’ll work out how to tackle internet piracy in a real way.
One day there might be a global response to online issues. One day it might be
feasible, as a creative, to make your money online.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Take DFTBA Records. Hank is personally responsible for an
innovative independent record label that has put the content creators in direct
contact with the people who want to support them. It has helped dozens of
online musicians make a real living from their music. Many of these people fall
outside the mainstream but have found a way to make money. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I genuinely think that we will be looking to the
vlogbrothers very soon and that their ideas and their innovations will inform
the future.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Then there’s John Green, who on top of everything else, is a
New York Times bestselling author, something you casually failed to mention. He
is famous and successful beyond the vlogbrothers brand. John Green articulates
things better than almost anyone I’ve ever encountered. The reason <i>The Fault in Our Stars</i> has been such a
huge success internationally (another thing that was never mentioned) is that
it is an incredible book. He’s a great writer. I also think his decision to
take paternity leave after the birth of his daughter was a pretty admirable
one. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">On another note, his wife is a very successful curator
working at a major art gallery. By suggesting she was somehow an idiot for
having children with John belittled her. She has never appeared in a
vlogbrothers video but I admire and respect her. She’s always seemed like an
amazing, inspiring woman and I thought that the throw-away reference to her
being dumb enough to have sex with a nerd was pretty disrespectful. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I’ve lost count of the times when I have looked to the
vlogbrothers. On numerous occasions they have restored my faith in humanity.
When London was burning during the riots and the global economy seemed poised
on the brink of collapse and I felt like the whole world was sliding into
chaos, they were the people who made me remember that there is good in the
world. When an international disaster happens, they are the people I turn to
for explanation and analysis. And sometimes I’m just sad, because sometimes
life is hard, and they’ll make a video that cheers me up and gives me the will
to go back outside and forge ahead. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">John and Hank Green are an inspiration to me and to
thousands and thousands of young people across the world. They are at the
forefront of their (numerous) fields and have fostered a community of people
who might just change the world. I think it’s a real shame you missed the
opportunity to explore that on the show.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Regards,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Alexandra Neill</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<i>This blog is largely neglected these days. To read more of my stuff, including a 50th Anniversary Doctor Who rewatch, head over to <a href="http://adventures-in-tv-land.blogspot.com/">Adventures in TV-Land</a>.</i></div>
Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-65687262545180293982012-09-18T12:29:00.003+10:002012-09-18T13:01:07.309+10:00Foreshadowing<div style="font-weight: bold; text-align: justify;">
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7256676531396806" style="font-weight: normal; text-align: start;"><b id="internal-source-marker_0.7256676531396806" style="font-weight: normal; text-align: start;"><span style="font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This post contains a large number of theories concerning Doctor Who. It therefore contains spoilers. </span></span></b></b></div>
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<span id="internal-source-marker_0.7256676531396806" style="text-align: start;"><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I have a lot of thoughts about Doctor Who. I have therefore complied a large number of them in one place for your reading pleasure. And so if any of my theories turn out to be right, I can prove I guessed because I put it on the internet. This mainly applies to the last theory.</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Arc Fleet</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">The Beast Below hinged on the idea that the earth was evacuated sometime during the 29th century because of a giant mutant star goat (or solar flares, whatever). Starship UK is just one of the arc ships which carried the population to safety. In Asylum of the Daleks, the ship which crashes on the Asylum is called “Alaska”. They make something of a big deal about the ship being called Alaska in fact. What if that’s not just a random name? What if The Alaska is another arc ship? There’s also a line in dinosaurs which mentions a “ship the size of Canada”. Possibly not the Canada you’re thinking of.</span></div>
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<a href="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/jSNKzuzbjFTItaqlo5gsJmf7Ou9COFNArdRBiVtrVLwy4u_hL850HKvn9nWYkoennXLbtpPQoUOzqwpdrRpC673jtK18lTtqKihGnvjjdJu8Tn4Ix6M" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="235px;" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/jSNKzuzbjFTItaqlo5gsJmf7Ou9COFNArdRBiVtrVLwy4u_hL850HKvn9nWYkoennXLbtpPQoUOzqwpdrRpC673jtK18lTtqKihGnvjjdJu8Tn4Ix6M" style="font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;" width="427px;" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Light Bulbs</span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Every episode so far has featured a flickering light bulb. There was the one in Amy’s dressing room during episode 1, the broken fitting at the Pond’s place in episode 2 and basically every single electric light in episode 3. Plus, The Doctor was finally changing the bulb of the TARDIS in Pond Life #5. You know what other episode have flickering lights in them? The ones with Weeping Angels. </span></div>
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<img height="203px;" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/ay69thSBakTRZJ8VRg4sL7smA6Z9oXKM2WNdjkx3H3pAmcaOXW55nZIQiTaPAPDfS4KSCSFyx6hkrQxwHQz4W_ypXmU6n8fENsiyY0iv0blpE6criJo" width="427px;" /><br />
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Christmas</div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">This theory bought to you by my boyfriend and sub-editor who has noticed that all three episodes so far feature a reference to Christmas and thinks that this might mean something. Thus:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">7.1</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The Doctor- "It's Christmas!"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">7.2: </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Rory- "I don't have a Christmas list."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The Doctor- "I do!"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">7.3</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The Doctor- "Someone's been peaking at my Christmas list!"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">This is clearly foreshadowing Christmas. Or something.</span></div>
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<img height="283px;" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/Rd5QzwqH-a_lR_XRkzoLFgMExXxIWZMuETCXsciy2jZoiyy7xXESUv1DbwhGfiWMAhGdsigHOUmdb0ulxVgEhjfFHRVzRh0S8Qrut2rX37Yv_pjlZH0" width="427px;" /></div>
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Doctor WHO</div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">The Doctor seems to be slowly erasing himself from existence. Oswin made the daleks forget him and then in Dinosaurs, the computer had no record of his existence. On the one hand, we know that The Doctor has been intentionally trying to lie low also we're not entirely sure how much of the universe thinks he's dead following Silencio. But what if there’s more to it than that? We still don’t really know what happened with the cracks. Silence hasn’t fallen yet. And we know that that cracks in the skin of the universe suck things from existence. Given that The Doctor's identity is looking like the whole point of next year, it's pretty interesting that he's losing his.</span></div>
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<a href="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/yxOYi_BkCPCrowb1i3x5mVPaeZV06ixWjru6oJoGMWaFQkMaHTWfPEzRWZIaX-_8TShT2SrS6OA7r0WGu8ekKQE4ILDonOxhb_iYr0b678m9jH-OC8I" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="249px;" src="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/yxOYi_BkCPCrowb1i3x5mVPaeZV06ixWjru6oJoGMWaFQkMaHTWfPEzRWZIaX-_8TShT2SrS6OA7r0WGu8ekKQE4ILDonOxhb_iYr0b678m9jH-OC8I" style="font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;" width="427px;" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold;">Make them remember you</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">When they're in the Parliament of the Daleks, The Doctor turns to Amy and says "make them remember you". This line is almost totally without context. At the end of the episode, Oswin breaks the forth wall to implore us to "remember". The Silence make us forget. The cracks made Amy forget Rory. The alternate universe made Rory forget Amy. There's an awful lot of forgetting going on. But what is it that we need to REMEMBER?</span></div>
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<img height="236px;" src="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/9Rn1xbH3Vx-ltedk4n7c_EljmSDGJgTvrtgMPIx_lqe1jv0KQ0jGDTaUaz5OaPTxsLVHRAoOYN-JIl45AYLqDbeZ_OGp0VKNnOY06cpCWiW-iZVxD04" width="427px;" /></div>
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Time skip</div>
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">There’s a lot of time gaps in the last few seasons. There’s the time between A Christmas Carol and the start of season 6. There’s the gap between River </span><span style="color: #222222;">poisoning</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"> The Doctor in Let’s Kill Hitler and him emerging from the TARDIS in a tux. Not to mention the multitude of gaps in series 7. The Doctor has aged several hundreds years in the last two seasons (according to him anyway). Either this is simply Moffat correcting the fact that The Doctor didn't actually age at all during the Davies era or he's keeping some secrets from us (and from the Ponds).</span></div>
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<img height="237px;" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/Pzy9wQHakKlW30ZgcWavolVc7NNGffigMBpbIxl4GG2D1kHGq8hxDD90QwVzouXzTthYHGUK34sC4P0qgqw72odazMy2oPH2459TWyztzDhlXL3i15Q" width="427px;" /><br />
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Never let him see you age</div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">So I’m pretty sure someone in a promo somewhere said to Amy “Never let him see you age.” In fact I’m pretty damn sure it was River. Now apparently I imagined this and no one ever actually said that in a promo in which case I am just physic. Every episode so far has featured something about the Ponds getting older. It’s mostly just Amy flat out saying she is old. The Doctor clearly doesn’t like this. He doesn’t like to see their mortality. This is clearly foreshadowing. Or just shadowing.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">(If you remember someone saying this in ANY trailer please get in touch because all my friends think I'm crazy).</span></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7256676531396806" style="font-family: inherit; font-weight: normal;"><b id="internal-source-marker_0.7256676531396806" style="font-weight: normal; text-align: start;"><span style="color: #222222; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Just this once everybody lives!</span></b></b></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div style="text-align: justify;">
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7256676531396806" style="font-family: inherit; font-weight: normal;"><b id="internal-source-marker_0.7256676531396806" style="font-weight: normal; text-align: start;"><span style="vertical-align: baseline;">I am pretty sure that the Ponds are not going to die. The reason for this is simple and it is this- Steven Moffat’s entire career thus far. Moffat has never killed anymore. Not a main character. And even the people he does kill, die in remarkably humane ways. I don’t think he’ll kill Amy or Rory. The current theory is that both of them will be sent back in time by the angels. We already know that an incarnation of River was living in New York in the 60s. Them being sent back in time would be zarking TRAGIC but in a happy/sad sort of way because they’d get to raise their child.</span></b></b></div>
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<span style="text-align: start;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img height="199px;" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/usUi6dRXv8_T31qd3bXOwPxWObQXrI5C8ffgxzm3RUmNzheirnNBFhdLXHL0HoCK7cuoyzeHcqVEpZjAmsXJr3ebRikU1jTvaz8aRd_GRWDlPOabfpk" width="427px;" /></span></b></span></div>
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<span style="text-align: start;"><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The rest of our lives</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; white-space: pre-wrap;">Having said that, I’m a little concerned by the parallels which seem to be emerging between Doctor Who and Press Gang. The ‘rest of our lives’ line is still haunting me. I can’t help thinking there’s an undertone of dreams in this series. And dreams always lead my mind to… I can’t say anything about Press Gang for those who are still watching it (or haven’t yet) but for those who’ve seen the end… yeah. I’m worried he might do that again.</span></div>
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<div style="font-weight: bold;">
The Dreamlord</div>
<span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;">There’s actually </span><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCRckQBFqWc" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #1155cc; vertical-align: baseline;">a prequel to Aslyum of the Daleks</span></a><span style="font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;">. You might not have seen it because hasn’t really been advertised. Which is weird. What’s even weirder is that, unlike pretty much every mini-episode ever, it isn’t all jolly and whimsical. This doesn’t feel like a throw away extra. It feels big. Somehow the fact that this is a dream message seems ominous. I still think that The Dreamlord (from Amy’s Choice) was passed over a little too quickly. Not that I think he’s coming back, but the idea that the person who hates The Doctor most is actually The Doctor himself is such a powerful idea. I wonder too whether that might link The God Complex and The Doctor’s greatest fear. When he opens that door he says “of course it would be you”. What if his greatest fear is actually himself?</span></div>
</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<img height="284px;" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/VRpBMTV0U9wN8v1FA4nu07SeyAaog1Qlp9zU7R4Dt9RYoxrs5E8vVUohAcf8VOPSRvbm90gxiLaxvn4A6I6qEulAaVWkMPydcOr0lMRL8WJiNUOTGjw" width="427px;" /></div>
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</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="font-weight: bold;">
And then he woke up, and it was all a dream</div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">All of which leads us rather nicely to my BIG theory!</span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">The Doctor is actually a Dalek who dreams of a normal humanoid life. His entire existence to date has been the pathetic delusions of a deranged mind. The reason he’s constantly fighting the Daleks is because, like Oswin, he’s battling his Dalek </span><span style="color: #222222;">subconsciousness</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">. The reason he can never beat the Daleks despite trying REALLY REALLY hard is that he can never truly defeat his true nature. Plus whenever he dies in his imaginary adventures he just comes back as a different guy because THIS IS MY DREAM AND I DO WHAT I WANT. Asylum of the Daleks is foreshadowing the fiftieth anniversary when it turns out the answer to the ultimate questions (Doctor WHO?) is actually DALEK.</span></div>
</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<img height="427px;" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/1NkySyysrNPFWUEZA6zj4wzLyPqcZw3NwRsvIKPVzFuxXDyUzRo7s6Si7AGTpAlqdXSwKF2gUU9UOZAFu3R_kfTAtzvTC1WFkS1R1GAWlpHF9Nr6MH4" width="427px;" /></div>
</span></span>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-52115362565358824522012-09-02T14:18:00.001+10:002012-09-02T14:21:43.387+10:00Asylum of the Daleks<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBL685YVhcj3NmijHJSilWgR6HV_jjWJEGCQKwOcLiaG0O9HdraGxH91w1CI5qHC0KaNl93pPVkLJQMZa-K1uEjYZNm-JexvCN213e_-y0OT4rYeKMrHBkVT455g1JebMUGVmgnmXW5PY/s1600/tumblr_m9oxl8QPAV1qgcr3ao1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBL685YVhcj3NmijHJSilWgR6HV_jjWJEGCQKwOcLiaG0O9HdraGxH91w1CI5qHC0KaNl93pPVkLJQMZa-K1uEjYZNm-JexvCN213e_-y0OT4rYeKMrHBkVT455g1JebMUGVmgnmXW5PY/s320/tumblr_m9oxl8QPAV1qgcr3ao1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><br /></b></div>
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<b>THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS!</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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This morning I woke up at 4:58am. That is just nuts. We woke
my brother up by way of sonic screwdriver, made tea and settled ourselves on
the lounge. We watched Doctor Who and then we made pancakes and ate them in the
sun. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I was sceptical about <a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com.au/2012/08/wanted-one-interdimensional-cabin.html">this whole iView thing</a>. But I loved
this morning.<o:p></o:p></div>
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iView turned out to be kind of excellent. First of all the ABC’s
servers didn’t crash, which I thought might happen. Plus the picture quality
was actually really decent. Massive kudos to the ABC for orchestrating the
whole thing, and doing it RIGHT.<o:p></o:p></div>
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One of the things that makes me mourn the decline of
broadcast television is the loss of the shared viewing experience. One of my
favourite things about TV is the collective building of excitement and the
ongoing speculation. There was something so special about arriving at school on
a Monday morning and yelling at each other about Doctor Who. I miss that. I
miss everyone falling in love with shows <i>at
the same time</i>.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Today, Doctor Who was basically a global experience. There
are an awful lot of countries that are going to be, LEGALLY, watching the new
episodes within hours of each other. That’s kind of great. <o:p></o:p></div>
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There’s something really amazing about getting to be in the
thick of the whole Doctor Who experience for the first time in years without
sacrificing my morals. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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And what a year to be in the thick of.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I loved Asylum of the Daleks. I thought it was just the
right mix of warm honey, magic and gung-ho action. There was romance and drama
and suspense and funny bits and sad bits and EVERYTHING. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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The fact that Jenna Louise Coleman (henceforth know as J-Lo)
is in this episode was kept spectacularly under wraps. That was such a
wonderful surprise. I loved her character too. Clara (I’m calling her Clara,
even though she was Oswin in this episode) is going to have such massive shoes
to fill and it looks like she might actually pull it off. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The soufflé part was beautiful. I loved that she took that
seed of doubt and uncertainty and made it into soufflés. She turned Dalek into
human. With nothing but hypothetical eggs. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I’ve got no idea where Steven Moffat is going to take it
from here. The obvious thing is that he’ll travel backwards along Oswin/Clara’s
personal timeline and meet her before she crashed on the Asylum. But somehow
that’s all a little too River Song. It’s too simple and… I just don’t think
that’s what they’ll do. For some reason I sort of like the idea of there being
two of her. Maybe that’s a hangover from my “River is Lintilla” theory (which
never really took off because no one really understood the complicated
cross-references involved and also it was stupid). <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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My favourite theory is one Alex and his friend Ian came up
with – the new companion is actually a Dalek. So everything that happens
involves her being a human in her imagination and a Dalek in reality. This
would be very hilarious and cool.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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But before we meet Clara/Oswin for real, we have to say
goodbye to the Ponds.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Rory: How long can we wait for him?<o:p></o:p></div>
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Amy: For the rest of our lives.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Anyone who’s familiar with Press Gang will know that “the
rest of my life” is an awfully loaded and inherently tragic phrase. I really
hope it’s not foreshadowing. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That line right there gave me an awful lot of Spike and
Lynda feels. I’ve never really noticed the parallels between Amy and Rory’s
relationship and Spike and Lynda’s but now they’re there, clear as day, and I’m
really unsure where Moffat is going to take them. Having addressed the tension
in their relationship so beautifully, I really hope they run with it. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I cried a bit when Amy talked about not being able to have
kids. What <i>did</i> happen to Amy at Demon’s
Run? We don’t know. Not really. But her infertility hints at all sorts of
horrors. The Doctor hasn’t exclusively been a blessing in their lives. You
could argue that he hasn’t been a blessing at all. I get the feeling they’ll be
a lot more crying before Moffat is done with us. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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On top of all that we’ve got this huge thing of The Doctor
being wiped from the Dalek mainframe. Seriously guys. THAT IS SO HUGE. It
raised the issue that The Doctor’s reputation is a destructive force. The Daleks
are more powerful for their hatred of him. Is he constantly saving the human
race from enemies that he himself has helped create? <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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The Doctor said “Doctor who?” for only the second time in
this episode (Let’s Kill Hitler was the first). I still think that him saying
it is more important than anyone else uttering the words. It isn’t simply the
phrase that will cause silence to fall, it’s the question. The <i>actual</i> question. Which no one really
asks. Doctor <i>WHO?</i> The Doctor himself
saying it is a contradiction to his usual denial. He ignored the question
because it can’t be asked. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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What Moffat has done is set the series up magnificently. He’s
addressed a lot of things that have only been hinted at before now, suggesting
that there’s a lot more stuff to come. The last two series have been loaded
with a lot of awful loose ends and it’s starting to look like an awful lot of
those will be tied up by the end of next year. <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd6zlXW9lS6S6Dl2CtP1c18giQDOMORgXD62cWxIGctEkYHPWa_5flG7Vt9ywS35eZ9R02tWi6QuhF2a0AeBMM3oUViIvCF8emDZPBXWOmhLXFPZMCTUMNyjGa4BQq_NRox8gUEA5N_JA/s1600/tumblr_m9p1l6unyF1qgcr3ao1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd6zlXW9lS6S6Dl2CtP1c18giQDOMORgXD62cWxIGctEkYHPWa_5flG7Vt9ywS35eZ9R02tWi6QuhF2a0AeBMM3oUViIvCF8emDZPBXWOmhLXFPZMCTUMNyjGa4BQq_NRox8gUEA5N_JA/s320/tumblr_m9p1l6unyF1qgcr3ao1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b>SPECULATION CORNER:</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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The issue of Matt’s regeneration, and when that will happen,
is still a contentious and difficult one. Thing is we just don’t know what the
deal is. BUT there’s another big change that looks like it might be on the
horizon – a new show runner. While there’s no official word of this, I think it’s
pretty unlikely that Moffat will stay beyond next year. He’s done his dash,
written a mammoth story arc and once it’s finished I think he’d actually be
ready to bow out. At the moment we’ve got two theories about who’ll take over-<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Gatiss">Mark Gatiss.</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chris_Chibnall">Chris Chinball.</a> <o:p></o:p><br />
More to come on this later.</div>
Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-40854754698801386342012-08-28T18:29:00.001+10:002012-08-28T18:33:29.489+10:00WANTED- one interdimensional cabin<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7pgFrB8pYEtQdX_QwVFhXjeRx2jM2dn_f9m4R-3dlSkaSmLzrtfmM_tDiLcysaap7t_LSTpOWoIpgt_6DMHqGFS1k5L74d_pbhhg1cVuXW7x5liTav7ogTyDi_sZw8U6zF-GBZkDiLDE/s1600/Doctor-who-wallpaper-pic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7pgFrB8pYEtQdX_QwVFhXjeRx2jM2dn_f9m4R-3dlSkaSmLzrtfmM_tDiLcysaap7t_LSTpOWoIpgt_6DMHqGFS1k5L74d_pbhhg1cVuXW7x5liTav7ogTyDi_sZw8U6zF-GBZkDiLDE/s320/Doctor-who-wallpaper-pic.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Sometimes I wish I could travel to a secret cabin in another
universe to watch Doctor Who. Doctor Who wouldn’t exist in our universe and I’d just go
to the cabin and watch it free from distraction or interference. I would also
have a special robot which would simply nod while I told it all my theories. It
would probably be called Moffat. Watching Doctor Who in the real world is stressful.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sometimes I think I actually love Doctor Who too much. I
passed the point of regular, sane fandom some time ago and I think I’m just
spiralling downward toward the 50<sup>th</sup> anniversary.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I’ve had the feeling for weeks that the ABC had something up
their sleave. I thought maybe we were going to get season 7 fast tracked. In a
lot of ways we are I guess. But I’m really not sure how I feel about it all.<o:p></o:p></div>
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In case you’ve been avoiding all other webpages in order to
get your information exclusively from yours truly- this year’s episodes of
Doctor Who will be available <a href="http://blogs.abc.net.au/abc_tv/2012/08/the-doctor-to-premiere-on-iview.html">on iView at 5am every Sunday</a> – immediately after
they air in the UK. They will air on ABCTV a week later, at 7:30pm from
September 8<sup>th</sup>. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I should, theoretically speaking, be completely ecstatic
about this. We, Australia, are getting Doctor Who mere minutes after it
finishes airing in the UK. That’s exciting.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Am I excited? <o:p></o:p></div>
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Sort of. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I guess.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I honestly think streaming is the answer. I’ve thought that
for a long time. If obtaining content legally is actually easier than getting
it illegally, evidence suggests that people will avoid piracy (even if, heaven
forbid, they have to pay). My dream (if I can’t have old fashioned TV, which I
think we can agree – I can’t) is a global streaming network. In my dream world
everyone, no matter where they live, gets content at the same time. You pay a subscription
fee, and maybe a little extra to watch special things. That money trickles back
down to the content producers. Everyone gets TV when they want it and the
people who deserve to get paid, get paid. There’s quite a lot of stuff standing
in the way of this dream but I honestly think I could see it in my lifetime. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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iView is one of the global frontrunners as far as online
streaming goes. I remember when the ABC launched the service a few years ago I
read an article saying that it was so far ahead of the curve that it was going
to take several years for internet connections to catch up. Remember in the dark
days before online catch-up? When a VHS malfunction could ruin your whole day?
My childhood was traumatic. iView is great. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Watching Doctor Who on iView counts too. I know I’m one of
the seven people outside the TV industry who care about ratings, but going on
record as having supported a specific show by taking the time to watch it,
excites me. I don’t usually get to go on record simply by watching TV because I
don’t have a landline or a people meter.<sup><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-AU; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;">1</span></sup> Every single time something is
streamed online that data is recorded as the digital part of official ratings. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I definitely think this move is a step in the right
direction. The TV nerd in me <i>is</i>
really excited. I think it’s properly fantastic. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But the thing is… given the choice between watching Doctor
Who on iView and watching it on TV, I would usually choose TV. Hands down.
Given the choice between watching anything on a laptop and watching it on a
television, I’m going to choose the TV. Especially if I’m watching said thing
for the first time. Especially if said thing is Doctor Who. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
iView doesn’t address a lot of the reasons I usually choose
to wait. I choose the wait because I want to watch Doctor Who, the most
important show in all of creation, in high definition. I love the ritual of
Doctor Who. I plan my day around it. I make TARDIS pie and dance around my
kitchen to Chameleon Circuit. I eat dinner at 7pm and I’m in front of the TV at
7:25. I watch the weather on the ABC. At 8:15pm I’ll usually text beccamarsh,
or she’ll text me. I guess this all makes me sound a little bit unstable in the
mental department, and maybe I am, but Doctor Who means a lot to me. The ritual
of it really matters. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So the TV obsessive in me is less excited. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Maybe I just need a new ritual. Maybe that means getting up
at 5am every Sunday. Maybe that means watching it at 7:30pm on Sunday nights,
exactly like I usually would only a week early. Maybe that means waiting
anyway. Maybe it means getting a cabin and another dimension and a robot.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m not sure I’ve decided yet.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
<i>I'm going to try and write a weekly blog this year. Plus I'd like to talk a bunch about the infinite number of theories I have for next year. If you harass me, I am more likely to do this. </i></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">1- It doesn’t matter if you don’t know what a people meter*
is. Or what a landline is. I think they probably need to rethink how they
record ratings…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">* Owning a people meter is basically my dream**.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">** I am a bit of a loser, yes.***</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">*** My boyfriend and sub-editor wrote this footnote without my permission. He is the loser.</span></div>
Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-15111493001777334262012-03-19T19:11:00.000+11:002012-03-19T19:11:52.055+11:00Jumping Sharks<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFqcDCrV7OK3UVyFbcrzruUnkJSwfa3pmhF7exhER5EDzvEYLc0_nX7rexAYrkZNP1mEcs5_gzwRJqal3asQaShAH9zp3SyCv8rJ8kJ4sUVf2FR8XO5zMcXelrLH1bm-LItsNzHJnRQubW/s1600/DCmETMO4lyIS6E5bKlIvR0.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFqcDCrV7OK3UVyFbcrzruUnkJSwfa3pmhF7exhER5EDzvEYLc0_nX7rexAYrkZNP1mEcs5_gzwRJqal3asQaShAH9zp3SyCv8rJ8kJ4sUVf2FR8XO5zMcXelrLH1bm-LItsNzHJnRQubW/s400/DCmETMO4lyIS6E5bKlIvR0.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<i>This post contains minor spoilers for Misfits season 3.</i><br />
<br />
Quite high on the list of phrases I don't get to say often enough is this one- "jumping the shark."<br />
For those of you not up on your slightly obscure TV jargon, the term refers to the moment in a television franchise when you stop believing it. When something so totally ridiculous happens that you can't suspend disbelief any more. It’s the moment when a show once and for all looses credibility. <br />
(Here’s a fun fact- the origin of the term is an episode of Happy Days when Fonzie literally jumped over a shark on a jet ski.)<br />
<br />
I’ve always been a little sad that I couldn’t list a specific example of the phenomena. The moment in Doctor Who when The Master started shooting Sith lightening and jumping over rubbish tips came close, but then Moffat came along and made Doctor Who good again. There were no significant sharks jumped. Its hard to sound like an obnoxious TV-nerd without examples.<br />
Be careful what you wish for.<br />
<br />
Misfits is a great show. I remember watching series 1 and thinking “Wow. This is actually something NEW.” Along with Life on Mars, Ashes to Ashes and Being Human, it marked what seemed like a new genre. A kind of super-real super-natural drama. Gritty and unbelievable all at once. And I was EXCITED by that. When Robert Sheehan (who played Nathan) announced he was leaving at the end of series 2 I was as sad as the next fan-girl. I had that feeling. That awful creeping feeling that they should stop. That the show should cut its looses and quit while it was ahead.<br />
<br />
Thing is I’ve thought that a lot. The moments when a show surprises you and is GOOD when you are so convinced it will be bad, are the reason I watch TV. Misfits was that kind of show from the very beginning. So I had faith. And the beginning of series 3 showed promise. I liked Rudy. I liked that he almost, but not quite, replaced Nathan. I was intrigued to see what our (anti)heroes would do with their new powers.<br />
<br />
Then it happened.<br />
That Hitler episode. If you’ve seen series 3 of Misfits, you know exactly what I’m talking about. Now I like a good bit of time travel. And some people will quote me out of context as saying I like Hitler. But WHAT THE HELL. There was not a moment of this episode I believed. When it was over I wanted quite desperately to retcon the whole thing from my brain and pretend it never happened. Its like that quote from Sherlock- you believe the lie because it is wrapped in a layer of truth.<br />
Misfits had just discarded the flimsy shiny outside wrapper and the boiled lolly underneath looked awfully like someone had sucked on it and dropped it on the ground a few times.<br />
<br />
So in the next episode when they DISCONNECTED A GIRL FROM LIFE SUPPORT and transported her to the COMMUNITY CENTRE in the BACK OF A CAR. I couldn't just ignore that blatant disregard for logic. Don't even get me started on that episode with the zombies and the iguana.<br />
<br />
I’m still watching Misfits. And I want to like it, I really do. But its lost me. Its hard to say if the scripts and the acting is the same as it ever was. It certainly doesn’t FEEL that way. But what’s really changed is me. I don’t care anymore. I don’t want to know how Simon becomes future Simon. I don’t care if Kelly lives happily ever after with The Powers Man. I don’t care if Curtis ever manages to get a decent power or some proper character development.<br />
I. Just. Don’t. Care.<br />
<br />
I’ll keeping watching though. Partly out of misguided optimism. Partly out of loyalty to a once amazing show. Mostly because I wouldn’t put it past Misfits to cut their loses and throw in an actual shark. And I wouldn’t want to miss that.<br />Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-7450849455910443842012-02-19T10:19:00.000+11:002012-02-19T10:19:16.120+11:00Rich man, poor man, beggar man, thief...<br />
<i>This post is a response to <a href="http://edwardspoonhands.com/post/17837474202/are-we-a-culture-of-theft">this post</a> by Hank Green</i><br />
<br />
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<br />
There is definitely a certain amount of prestige which surrounds downloading.<br />
<br />
I <a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com.au/2012/01/cheating.html">chose to watch <i>Sherlock</i> illegally</a>. That wasn’t a decision I chose lightly and it isn’t something I think I’ll ever do routinely. I will champion the legal watching of television with my dying breath. <i>Sherlock</i> was the exception. I’ll still wait to watch <i>Doctor Who</i>, hiding resolute in my spoiler proof bunker. I watched Sherlock that way because I honestly felt like it was my only choice.<br />
<br />
One of my main reasons for watching TV the legal way wherever I can is that one day I want to work in TV. It seems ridiculous to buy into a culture that many believe is killing the industry. I don’t think this is necessarily the case, the popularity of television is far from failing, but I do think that the internet has the potential to change to way we watch TV. And that could be very scary indeed.<br />
<br />
Despite the various people screaming in defiance, I think I agree with Hank. There is a prestige to downloading. A certain allure. It is so easy to feel excluded when all the people around you (both actually and virtually) are championing one way of viewing (oh the joys of watching a download bar!) while you remain firm to another (sitting in front of a TV at an allocated time). I agree that it isn’t JUST the quality of the programming that leads people to download. If everyone is tormenting something it must be good right? It must be worth the effort?<br />
<br />
I think this has produced a culture where local shows are looked down on. More and more people will tell you they “don’t watch TV”. What they mean by that, of course, is that they don’t watch TV on TV.<br />
<br />
Right now the ABC is going through a<a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com.au/2011/12/cancel-all-plans.html"> pretty amazing stage</a>. The shows which are being produced in Australia have suddenly soared in quality. The production values, script writing, acting, everything, is at an international standard. For the first time I can remember, I am more excited about what my own country is producing than what’s going on anywhere else in the world.<br />
I’ll admit that Australia has never made <i>Sherlock </i>or <i>Doctor Who</i>. But I loved <i>Laid </i>and I’m quickly falling in love with <i>Outland</i>. I watched <i>The Slap</i> with the rest of the nation (you can tell a show is really popular when, instead of live tweeting it, your Twitter feed goes totally dead the minute it starts). I plan to make myself free when <i>Dance Academy</i> comes back on and every Wednesday night (seriously- <i>Woodley, Gordon St Tonight, Outland</i>. That is a line-up I'd become a social recluse for).<br />
<br />
What makes me sad is that people don’t torrent local content. I know you CAN (I’m reliably informed you can torrent anything) but without the kind of hype big international releases get, how are people going to know what to look for? There’s a kind of stigma around local shows- ‘But that was made here. Why would that be any good?’<br />
<br />
Is there anyone, anywhere is the world who torrents our shows? And if the answer is ‘no, not really’ does that make them less legitimate?<br />Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-49344265192032242672012-02-14T15:53:00.002+11:002012-02-14T16:01:27.651+11:00The Zaphod Beeblebrox Clause<br />
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<br />
Late last year, while camping, some friends and I spend a pleasant rainy evening composing a list of qualities which ideal males should have.<span style="font-size: x-small;">1</span> This list contained obvious things such as “a sense of humour” and “literacy”<span style="font-size: x-small;">2</span> but it also featured more niche qualities like “able to play a musical instrument” and “super powers”.<br />
The most significant thing about this list<span style="font-size: x-small;">3</span> is that it coined what I now refer to as “The Zaphod Beeblebrox Clause”<br />
<br />
The Zaphod Beeblebrox Clause makes reference to two specific qualities on the list, which are-<br />
<i>- has own space ship</i><br />
(and)<br />
<i>- not a douche</i><br />
The interesting thing about these two points is that the former actually has the ability to trump the later.<br />
If a guy is in possession of a space ship, he is able to be a douche and still win ones affections. The level of douche counteracting power a space ship has is in direct proportion to the availability of spaceships in any given situation.<br />
<br />
Basically The Zaphod Beeblebrox Clause answers that age old question-<br />
Why did Trillian go with Zaphod?<br />
In this situation (a party in Islington) spaceships are extremely rare. A guy who is not a complete douche<span style="font-size: x-small;">4</span> arrives with a very particular trump card (The Heart of Gold).<br />
Of course she went with him.<br />
Fucking spaceship.<span style="font-size: x-small;">5</span><br />
<br />
To celebrate the International Day of Chocolate and Over-Priced Roses, here's how Zaphod would go about getting a girl.<br />
And if you’re a nice guy without a space ship- don’t worry. You don’t need a clause to be in with a chance.<br />
Happy Valentine’s peeps. <br />
<b style="text-align: center;"><br /></b><br />
<b style="text-align: center;"> Fictional Pick-up Lines- The Zaphod Beeblebrox Edition</b><br />
<b style="text-align: center;"><br /></b><br />
<i>Hold the phone! This is a face in a million! Does perfection have another name?</i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>If I followed you home would you keep me?</i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>When Zarquon made you baby he made a laser beam…and he set you on stun!</i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>I’d grow back my third arm for you. </i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>Oh baby you make me see stars! How ‘bout I show you some planets?</i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>What’s say we made like alosamarian polar bears and break the ice?</i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>We gotta go, before you have to be back in heaven. </i><br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">1- I understand this is a cringe-ish-ly teenage way for four young woman to spend time but it was raining, ok? Like there was a lot of rain. And we were in a tent. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">2- Literacy was embarrassingly far down the list.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">3- Which will one day be readily available online somewhere.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">4- He really isn't. Zaphod has the ability to be genuinely intelligent and charming. Zaphod is pretty BAMF really.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">5- It doesn't hurt that Trillian has something of a soft spot for almost complete douches *coughcoughTHORcough*.</span>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-30824060019726943262012-01-17T13:29:00.001+11:002012-01-20T15:18:21.153+11:00The fall<br />
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I have a theory.<br />
(Yes, yes, yes. I know I have a lot of theories. But I’m pretty sure you come here with the express intention of reading about my hair brained theories so shut up and listen to my theory.)<br />
I have this theory that Steve Thompson doesn’t actually exist.<br />
This is based on a number of things. First of all, despite being the third Sherlock writer, his Wikipedia page is practically a stub. Second of all (and more importantly) when you type his name into Google images you get a lot of pictures of a creepy albino model dude who I’m pretty sure doesn’t spend his spare time going to cafes with Moffat and Gatiss. So my theory is that Steve Thompson is actually a pseudonym that Moffat and Gatiss have invented because everyone said they couldn’t POSSIBLY write all the episodes themselves and didn’t they have other things they should be doing like maybe making that Doctor Who thing that everyone likes so much? After the first series of Sherlock, they decided they’d give their “friend” “Steve” a little more creditability by letting him write an episode of Doctor Who. Except instead of writing it themselves, Moffat let his sons write it. Hence the good-intentions-but-ultimately-disappointing-resolution. So that’s my theory. I did say it was hair brained. I should possibly mention that I rather enjoy ‘Paul is dead (and also the walrus koo-koo-ka-choo)’ conspiracy theories. <br />
<br />
Reichenbach rather lends itself to theories. Take this one-<br />
<em>Sherlock didn’t die because it wasn’t him who jumped. </em><br />
Let me now allow you to debate this point. Given that you are a virtual reader, I will play both parts. You can be in bold.<br />
<br />
<strong>But Sherlock was definitely standing on top of the building.</strong><br />
Ah yes! But John was quite a distance away and could possibly have mistake someone ELSE is a large flappy coat with striking features for Sherlock from that distance. <br />
<strong>But they were talking on the phone.</strong><br />
The real Sherlock could have been out of sight and the fake one was just holding a phone and it was made to look like the real one via camera tricks. <br />
<strong>But John saw Sherlock looking all bloody and dead and it was definitely him because DID YOU SEE THE CHECK BONES?</strong><br />
When John got hit by the bike, Molly and Sherlock rushed in and really quickly swapped the fake Sherlock for the real Sherlock who pretended very convincingly to be dead what with being a master of disguise and all.<br />
<strong>Yeah but…John’s a doctor.</strong><br />
But, in fairness, he does have a habit of being pretty stupid sometimes. Did you see the way he opened the envolope containing mysterious powder someone just left on his doorstep despite several hired killers being ACTUALLY VISIBLE AT THE TIME. And also Molly possibly gave Sherlock some drugs that made him seem dead like they did that time in Romeo and Juliet. <br />
<strong>So then the fake Sherlock jumped?</strong><br />
Yep.<br />
<strong>So where did Sherlock get someone to pretend to be him while jumping off a building?</strong><br />
From Molly. Obviously. <br />
<strong>And where did Molly get them?</strong><br />
The morgue. DUR!<br />
<strong>So the fake Sherlock was…dead…all along and would possibly have difficulty pretending to talk on the phone and also jumping off buildings?</strong><br />
Well…yes. <br />
<br />
All in all, our second theory is better. It goes like this- <br />
Molly gave Sherlock some special Falling Off Building Drugs which allow one to survive blunt force trauma when leaping from great heights. <br />
<br />
So basically all you're getting for today is theories. I also have a few pretty good ones about what John’s going to do when he finds out Sherlock isn't dead (hint- pitch a spaz) and who’s going to be married when the series comes back (hint- EVERYONE). But for now I have to go and read The Fault in Our Stars (which has already made me cry and I’m only up to chapter six) and write bad fan-fiction in my head while SHIPPING ALL THE SHIPS.<br />
<br />
Damn I love Sherlock.Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-31633074577380348782012-01-16T14:12:00.002+11:002012-01-17T15:33:28.764+11:00Hounds of Baskerville<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dashing</td></tr>
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<br />
I suppose one of the main problems is that I loved <i>Hound of the Baskervilles</i>.<br />
<br />
When I was trying to decide what the best book I read in 2011 was, the choice was pretty easy. The fact that I finished it a few days into January did make me a little depressed and gave me a feeling that I might have rather wasted 12 months of reading time. When I read <i>Hound</i>, I found myself stopping at the end of every chapter and putting the book down. This wasn’t because I didn’t want to keep reading, it was because I didn’t want it to end. I made that book last as long as I possibly could. I haven’t done that before or since.<br />
<br />
It was always going to be hard for Sherlock (as wonderful as it is) to live up to that.<br />
Did it?<br />
Ok, not really.<br />
Was it a frankly wonderful piece of television never the less?<br />
Yes. Yes it was.<br />
<br />
I’ve seen <i>Belgravia </i>four times now and every time I watch it I notice more canon jokes. There were some pretty clever ones in <i>Hounds</i>. The apparent light signing in Morse code and the pair in the inn with their giant dog. Quite a few times I thought “Aha! I see what they did there! They must be taking it in X direction from the book!” And then the story moved in a totally different direction and I was surprised. That was pretty great.<br />
Most importantly, it had the essence of the original. <i>Hound </i>is a tale laced with superstition. It’s the case that makes Holmes question all the things he believes in. I think Benedict played that remarkably well.<br />
<br />
Then there was all the homoerotic undertones (I can’t help thinking Gatiss ships that a bit more than Moffat does). And Benedict wearing THAT purple shirt while loping moodily through a graveyard. And Lestrade looking tanned and being called Greg.<br />
I was not disappointed with the quantity of shots of Sherlock looking dashing atop large boulders. There was a reasonable number of those. Also moorland. These things are important.<br />
<br />
So, the ending wasn’t totally satisfying but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t GOOD. I should probably go and watch it three more times. It was good enough to watch three more times (or fifty-three more times, which I inevitably will).<br />
<br />
<b>SPECULATION CORNER</b><br />
By the time you read this, there’s a fair chance you’ll have already seen <i>The Reichenbach Fall</i>. Currently I’m waiting for beccamarsh to come over so we can watch it. I’ve been working myself into a state of moderate hysteria all week. It is looking increasingly likely that it will finish and go immediately to the dentist to talk about getting my wisdom teeth out.<br />
And I will be a total emotional wreck.<br />
I’m looking forward to that.<br />
So basically its going to be TOTALLY FUCKING AWFUL. The problem is that is has the potential to be fucking awful in a number of different ways. Steve Thompson is writing this one. He’s best known for being the guy who wrote “the other one” in the last series. Also that episode of Doctor Who with the pirates and Kenny that contained about as many plot holes as a colander. I really want to think the best of him as a writer. I really, really do. But that pirate episode was a massive let down. So apart from being generally soul crushing it could also be…not as good. And I don’t know if I can bear that.<br />
<br />
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go and stare at a download bar.Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-16951569959145880822012-01-03T11:26:00.001+11:002012-01-03T11:39:49.229+11:00A Scandal in Belgravia<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">'I've never begged for mercy in my life.' </td></tr>
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<br />
A Scandal in Belgravia has proudly taken its place among that very special breed of television. The kind which provokes in me a reaction which can’t be articulated, which is made entirely of violent gestures and high pitched noises. In fact, after finishing it I spent about half an hour randomly collapsing against the lounge, hugging a pillow to by head and making pained, sobbing sounds. I also wept quietly into a cupboard and yelled at some soup.<br />
I don’t think I have ever hated Steven Moffat as much as I hated him then.<br />
<br />
I used to wonder what it was that made a masterpiece. An ok painting and a (supposedly) really fucking amazing painting look pretty much the same on paper. Then I realised. In the flesh its rather a different matter. You can see the masterpiece the second you walk into the room. It’s the painting that, despite all the others, draws your gaze. That emblazes itself into your memory and, for a second, takes your breathe away.<br />
Put simply Belgravia is a masterpiece, in the truest sense of the word.<br />
<br />
It is very, very hard to tell you how the episode make me feel. Probably because it made me feel All The Things.<br />
<br />
Reading the original stories was worth it. It was worth it just for the way I squealed when Sherlock said “Speckled Blonde”. The first fifteen minutes or so were basically just Moffat having his own little Conan Doyle fan convention in the corner. And it was rather lovely to have enough fandom knowledge to afford a ticket.<br />
<br />
There were so many moments. Staying Alive. Shut up Mrs Hudson. Mrs Hudson. Molly and her present and the awful, awful tension of Sherlock’s rant. Sherlock in a sheet. The ashtray. Moriarty. And Mycroft. AND THE VIOLIN. And the moment when I was totally convinced that the people in the plane were merely awaiting the shipment of small lemon soaked paper napkins and would wake up shortly to be served tea and biscuits. Just everything. The only times I wasn’t giggling manically or squealing hysterically I was holding my breathe or resiting the urge force quit the whole exercise before me brain actually exploded.<br />
<br />
The sexual tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. And a blunt one at that. Now I like sexual tension as much as the next person. I would actually be willing to hazard that I probably like it slightly more than the average next person. But when it reaches such a level that it is <i>actually physically painful</i> you should really take a moment to think about what it is you’re inflicting on your audience.<br />
<br />
Come to that I CAN’T SHIP THAT MANY PEOPLE AT A TIME DAMMIT! I can’t. My brain is not physically, emotionally or mentally able to sustain it. The worst part is (with the possible exception of Sherlock/Molly) its all canon. I’ve just finished reading the original stories and you can’t go through that without coming to ship John/Sherlock pretty fucking hard. Arthur Conan Doyle shipped John/Sherlock. This is undeniable fact. If anyone told me a week ago that Sherlock/Adler would come very, very close to beating that I would have said “HA!” and read them the passage from The Return of Sherlock Holmes where Holmes and Watson hold hands.<br />
But Adler bought something of a trump card to the table- I actually wanted it to happen. I don’t really want John and Sherlock to leap into bed together. I’m honestly not sure what I would do if they did. But MY GOD YOU TWO. I don’t care if John’s sitting right there! He’s got his laptop and an internet connection right? He can amuse himself for a while. JUST FUCKING HAVE ALL THE SEX RIGHT NOW PLEASE.<br />
<br />
Those who know me even marginally well are aware that this isn’t the sort of thing I make a habit of saying. Certainly not in capital letters. I’m usually a fan of the implied. But Moffat has broken my brain and now I can’t stop wondering what happened when Irene and Sherlock were stuck in the middle of the desert together for an undisclosed period of time.<br />
<br />
Now if you’ll all excuse me I think I need to take a little bit more time to try and recover before whatever fresh hell they have planned for next week. <br />
<br />
<b>SPECULATION CORNER!</b><br />
The second episode is written by Gatisis and based on Hound of the Baskervilles. Hound is almost certainly my favourite Holmes story. It had me utterly, totally baffled right up until the last moment. Because the only possible explanation was a really fucking big dog. And seeing as how there obviously couldn’t be a really fucking big dog there was no possible way to account for all the factors. The way the Conan Doyle did was brilliant. It blew me away. I am, needless to say, ridiculously excited to see how Gatisis is going to twist it. The beauty of Sherlock lies in its ability to surprise and delight those who haven’t read the stories AND those who know them back to front. There are almost no adaptations that can claim that. What makes the expectation rather more tense is the title-<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>The Hounds of Baskerville</i></div>
Who would have thought that moving one little word and putting an S in the wrong place could be so totally intriguing. I am excite.<br />
<br />
<br />Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-70181876998725882652012-01-02T14:32:00.000+11:002012-01-02T14:32:29.303+11:00Cheating<br />
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<br />
I find it occasionally disconcerting the things that I’m known for. Among these numerous peculiarities (which I should probably blame myself for sprouting around the internet) I am That Chick Who Waits a Whole Week to Watch Doctor Who.<br />
<br />
I’ve explained numerous times (once on a panel with Lawrence Leung and Dominic Knight in front of a room full of people) why this is something I swear by and why I think that its important. Most of you know my reasons and respect them, even if hardly anyone seems to understand them. This isn’t the time to rehash all that.<br />
This is a time to tell you about the exceptions.<br />
<br />
Don’t get me wrong. I remain a firm believer in the Proper Viewing of Quality Television. I’m not about the hang up my hat and become a pirate.<br />
In forty years time when everyone is watching TV-on-demand streamed straight to their inbuilt brain computers, I’ll be That Woman Who Still Owns a Television. As in days gone by, neighbourhood children will cluster into my lounge room to marvel at the technology. And I can make them all coconut ice and lemonade and they’ll gather around to hear tell of the Marvellous Television back in The Good Old Days. I’m obviously assuming the role of Liz Lemon style crazy spinster in this scenario. We all may as well get used to the idea. <br />
<br />
But there will always be exceptions, loopholes in my own code of conduct which occasionally allow the bending of rules. To give you an example, I watched Closing Time four days early. I can hear your gasps and cries of “hypocrite!” from here. But let me take you through the reasoning. That weekend was This is Not Art, a festival which readers of my main blog will be more than familiar with. I knew I’d be talking to people who love the show but who I rarely get to talk to. I knew a lot of them would have seen it. I knew I’d be out having a good time on the night it actually aired. I thought long and hard about it. And then I watched it early.<br />
I didn’t enjoy it. Honestly. It just wasn’t the same and I rather regretted the decision (at least until my DVR decided only to tape the first 15 minutes of it, the bastard). Its not an experience I think I want to repeat.<br />
<br />
Let me present you with a rather more taxing problem- Sherlock.<br />
Here are the factors at play. <br />
1- Channel Nine are showing no signs of putting Sherlock on soon. The first series rated extremely well and, as I feared, it looks like they might be holding it back for rantings season. Which is ages away. At least a month after it airs in the UK.<br />
2- Channel Nine will show it with ads. If the ABC had acquired Sherlock this whole thing would be a rather different matter. But I’m not sure I can stand to watch it with ads. Not if I have to wait as well.<br />
3- The areas of the internet I frequent are rather in love with Sherlock. The longer I wait the more Spoiler Danger I’m going to find myself in. Not to mention the amount of people IRL who I’ve introduced to it and who will want to talk about the new series, having promptly downloaded it.<br />
4- I’ve just finished working my way through the original stories (yes, ALL OF THEM) and I love them. I’m absolutely DYING to see how Moffat will do Adler, if Gatisis can do justice to Hound and whether That Other Guy will pull off Reichenbarch. Spoilers are a big deal here. A BIG DEAL. Even little ones.<br />
5- We’ve waited far too long already.<br />
<br />
Having said that I still WANT to watch it properly. I want to see that frankly spectacular cinematography (and those MOORS) in full high definition and I want to wait a WHOLE week between episodes. But those aren’t trump cards. When the first series aired I watched it on a TV so grainy I couldn’t read the onscreen texts and, in all their infinite wisdom, Channel Nine showed the episodes on Sunday, Monday and then the following Sunday. A frankly ludicrous thing to do.<br />
So I’m left with rather a conundrum. To Cheat or not to Cheat?<br />
<br />
So (SPOILERS!) I'm Cheating. I've weighed up all the factors and, for once, the side of evil has won. I've taken into account the fact that I'll probably never live this down. I'm prepared for that. There will probably be blogs because- Sherlock. If you haven't seen the episode in question DON'T READ THE BLOG. I will lynch you for ruining such majesty.<br />
<br />
I suppose this just goes to show that, given the right amount of chiselled jaw bone, sensational writing and homoerotic subtext, even I can be persuaded to betray the things I believe in.<br />Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-18151255074402244722011-12-08T17:46:00.001+11:002011-12-08T18:05:49.947+11:00Cancel all plans<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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There is only one word for the 2012 ABC line-up and it is this- epic.<br />
<br />
You should probably just cancel any plans you had for next year now. It’ll save you a lot of those awkward moments when you have to wiggle out of a social outing in order to stay inside and watch TV. People just don’t understand.<br />
<br />
Here, because I know you need my help to make up your minds, are my thoughts on the <a href="http://blogs.abc.net.au/abc_tv/2011/12/sneak-peek-whats-on-abc-tv-in-2012.html">show reel</a>.<br />
<br />
<i>The Straits-</i> I have no idea what this is about, except a geographical grounding. I remain unconvinced. <br />
<i>Rake-</i><b> </b>was good. More Rake equals more good.<br />
<i>Mabo- </i>I did Year 10 history. I understand why this is exciting. Plus it looks kind of great.<br />
<i>Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries- </i>Where did all these super high production values come from? Have the ABC started laundering money or something?<br />
Hurrah documentaries!<br />
First of all, art based reality TV (that rarest of rare breeds) is awesome.<br />
Secondly- William McInnes! Why are you hosting that auction show?!<br />
Nice to see the ABC ensuring Myf’s continued employment.<br />
<br />
I could write a whole post about the comedy line-up alone. You never know, I still might.<br />
<i>Outland</i>- A show about a gay science fiction club? I am optimistic.<br />
<i>Woodley</i>- There are very few ways in which this could be bad. Frank Woodley. Dressed as a giant egg. This will not be bad.<br />
<i>Laid</i>- Laid was one of my TV highlights of this year. Which is saying something in a year so full of good TV. I’ve been<a href="http://www.facebook.com/ABCTVLaid?ref=ts"> tracking series 2</a> in a way I can’t remember following a local show before. I’m pretty pumped. In case you hadn’t noticed.<br />
<br />
<i>Kitchen Cabinet</i>- You can’t deny it has a rather large novelty factor.<br />
<i>Dirk Gently</i>- There will be rants about this. You can bet your first born on it. It’s been out for about a year now. I haven’t tracked it down due to rather serious misgivings. I’m a huge Adams fan (*coughcoughUNDERSTATMENTcough*) and the reviews weren’t exactly glowing. There is no Monk. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBOl1OW7nnM">The door is not red</a>. I reserve judgement.<br />
ABC2 shows some rather odd things don’t they? Is that a show about dwarfs? Really?<br />
<br />
Now I understand that this is the point where us adults should stop watching. But-<br />
<i>Dance Academy</i>! Judge me at your leisure. I shall be rushing home from university to watch this.<br />
Although I probably can’t say the same for the show about Irish dancing.<br />
<br />
And ABC4Kids will keep showing kids shows and ABC24 will keep showing news.<br />
<br />
Excellent! Brovo! Standing ovation! Etc!<br />
<br />
And while we’re here, something that won’t be on the ABC…<br />
Everyone seems to be keeping Sherlock under pretty tight wraps. The preview screening of A Scandal in Belgravia is happening like RIGHT NOW so I can only assume that its pretty much done. The BBC has tentatively suggested a January airdate but we still have<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d3OUr55Rs8Q&feature=related"> no proper preview</a> and a <a href="http://cultfix.co.uk/sherlock-series-2-moriartys-back-15299.htm">few measly promo picks</a>. Put simply- someone is doing a damn good job. If television was measured in fan-base per second of footage, Sherlock would be up there with the great cult heroes. Riling that fan-base to a fever pitch of hysterical excitement can only be good for ratings. Less is most certainly more.<br />
<br />
I can only speculate about when we’ll get in Australia (not that most of you pirate fiends care). Nine is currently repeating the first series (always a good sign) and Sherlock features prominently in their “COMING IN 2012!!!!” (much less subtly than our ABC) trailer. Whether they’ll fork out to fast track it or wait until ratings season starts up again is anyone’s guess.<br />
<br />
Put simply- 2012 is going to be a good year to stay indoors.Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-48407266594746960582011-11-08T10:54:00.003+11:002011-11-08T10:56:56.398+11:00Come here often?<br />
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<i>In which Alex continues to document her growing obsession with pick-up lines from works of fiction. </i></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Surprise scones.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<i>In a place like this you move to the atmosphere.</i><br />
Press Gang<br />
Press Gang, as astute readers may have noticed, is so completely littered with wonderful pick-up lines that its basically a ‘how to guide’. It also furnishes fans with a series of slightly ridiculous romantic fantasies. Like the one about playing trivial pursuit. And an irrational desire to slow dancing without music.<br />
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<i>Because life is short and you are hot.</i><br />
Doctor Who- Blink<br />
Seriously, how is it that Steven Moffat does not get all the girls? Unlike many of the other example in these posts, this is a proper pick-up line of the I-went-to-this-pub-and-all-I-got-was-this-random-chick kind. Bonus points if, immediately after delivering it, you get transported into the past by homicidal statues.<br />
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<i>Are you a friend of Nigel’s?</i><br />
48 Shades of Brown<br />
It is a little known fact that if you want to learn more about how my mind works you need only read the collected works of Australian author Nick Earls. This may seem like something of a nothing pick-up line. If, however, you coupled it with spontaneously handing over a Chuppa-Chup, you might just get the opportunity to vomit in my hair (just go read the book ok? Its excellent). <br />
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<i>Can I pursue you now?</i><br />
John Green<br />
This is breaking the rules slightly because it is not, technically speaking, fictional. John Green actually used it to woe the Yeti. If the previous sentence made little or no sense to you I suggest you cancel any plans you had for the rest of the day and click <a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/vlogbrothers#g/c/D11540E6F91A7FAB">here</a>. John Green should also get all the girls.<br />
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<i>Surprise cake.</i><br />
All the rom-coms.<br />
This isn’t so much a pick-up line as a pick-up action. You know in romantic comedies when one of the romantic leads makes the other romantic lead a romantic cake and then leaves it on their doorstep and runs away? Yeah. Why don’t people do that in real life? I could totally go for that. Its got the words “surprise” and “cake” in it. What’s not to like?<br />
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<i>She wants to go out with you for texting and scones.</i><br />
Doctor Who- The Wedding of River Song<br />
Considering my favourite pick-up line of all time is both difficult to remember and obscure, I would happily settle for this one. This sounds like pretty much my ideal relationship. Anyone who likes texting, scones and Doctor Who has passed most of the main hurdles to my affections already.Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-32991423099160140082011-10-19T20:35:00.001+11:002011-10-19T20:46:29.984+11:00Haters gonna hate<br />
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Last week I met a guy.<br />
<br />
“Meet” is probably the wrong word. I was walking to class and happened upon a friend talking to a group of people I didn’t know. Said friend greeted me by pointing at the guy in question and yelling “Alex! He does not like Moffat!”<br />
<br />
This guy then proceeded to inform me (a girl he hadn’t even been introduced to) his opinions on Steven Moffat. He believes, and I quote, that Steven Moffat is “sexist, racist and homophobic.”<br />
I’ll give that a moment to sink in.<br />
<br />
I’m no stranger to anti-Moffat opinions. If you spend any length of time looking at a particular subject online, you’re going to come across people who don’t like it. This goes doubly for someone who people feel they need to have strong feelings about. I will openly admit that, on reading things that people tweet at Steven Moffat or post about him on Tumblr, I occasionally have the desire to track down the offenders IRL and set their letter boxes on fire.<br />
<br />
I was, it should be said, very restrained when I encountered this guy. I tried to present my counter arguments in a sane manner for a little while, realised this was fruitless and proceeded to excuse myself and walk away very quickly before I succumbed to the urge to ask him where he lived and whether or not he was in possession of a letter box. Sexist, racist AND homophobic? This guy was clearly was not in a right state of mind.<br />
<br />
Now I can understand how some people misconstrue certain things and thus come to the conclusion that Moffat is sexist. Taken out of context some stuff he’s said in interviews could create that impression. He very clearly ISN’T sexist (Lynda Day is one of the most empowered and inspiring female characters ever to grace our screens) but I can forgive that misconception. However, saying that the various pro-gay references in series 6 (which serve to NORMALISE homosexuality in a way which should be applauded) are condescending anti-gay slurs (that’s right, he actually thought that) is stretching the point a bit. I can’t even begin to comprehend how he arrived at racist.<br />
<br />
But I digress. I could spend any number of posts outlining the main flaws in this fundamentally flawed argument. I would, however, be preaching to the converted. Because a blind person could see that he’s wrong. That is not the point. The point is that Steven Moffat is not just some kind of vague conceptual entity who produces scripts without emotion. He’s a PERSON. A human being. A real one. And no one should be allowed to make those kind of comments about anyone. (Except maybe Tony Abbot. ZING! Political satire.)<br />
<br />
Haters ignore this fundamental fact. They forget that directing their unbridled (and usually ignorant) rage at someone is not a socially acceptable thing to do. There is no situation where ripping someone to shreds like that is ok. I don’t care what some parts of The Internet think- its just not.<br />
Which brings me to another point- The Internet.<br />
<br />
Now one guys expressing his opinion to me is very different to that same guy writing his thoughts down on a blog and tweeting it at Steven Moffat himself. That is really, really not cool. You know that Flight of the Concords song? No? Hang on, I’ll find a YouTube link…<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9G4J9dSSiE">there</a>. That’s what I’m getting at here.<br />
<br />
While I happily subscribe to the fangirl end of the spectrum, I’m not a hater. I can’t think of anyone I have the desire to out-poor my deep seated loathing for. Except maybe Mary Shelley but she’s dead. And she wrote that really rubbish book about mountains. I suppose maybe I’m a hater of Steven Moffat haters. Does that count?<br />
<br />
Here’s the thing- I’ve been in a television studio for seven hours while a team of people slave over an hour long show only to have some idiot rip it apart on Twitter. I’ve seen the love and devotion which is invested in something even though its subsequently panned (this could easily have been a post in defence of Good News World). I don’t think people should be allowed to hate on anything without knowing the sweat, tears and sleepless nights which went into creating it.<br />
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So in conclusion- Steven Moffat…well he’s just this guy, you know?Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-66099524878744375462011-08-28T18:37:00.001+10:002011-08-28T18:46:29.705+10:00Never too much of a good thing<div style="text-align: center;"><b><i>In which we try to watch a lot of Doctor Who in a row.</i></b></div><b>CAST</b><br />
Alex- who’s house it was and blog this is.<br />
Celeste- who has an alarming but useful skill for unlocking Alex’s windows<br />
Shona- Celeste’s friend. Non-Whovian. Down for the weekend being exposed to our wild social life.<br />
Rachel- very ill.<br />
Emma- slightly less ill.<br />
Liv- not ill at all.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><b>FRIDAY 26TH AUGUST</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6tzwuHGQdyT3U1fnsTsXqbTfcZ2ZS8RtQncXNkWMN29HpJqHO91V3U6VyWibjdbUKufjM2p90BARPVVestBowVOT33uAGe1c3hNSkbB-xMjK8b5091VXTM01UhNRs_Mp4uLhp8E_ehfg/s1600/orange+pants+003.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6tzwuHGQdyT3U1fnsTsXqbTfcZ2ZS8RtQncXNkWMN29HpJqHO91V3U6VyWibjdbUKufjM2p90BARPVVestBowVOT33uAGe1c3hNSkbB-xMjK8b5091VXTM01UhNRs_Mp4uLhp8E_ehfg/s320/orange+pants+003.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><b>2:55pm-</b> Go to shops and buy a pumpkin, two packets of jammie dodgers and the new Frankie. Am total hipster.<br />
<b>3:09pm-</b> My front door bites my sonic screwdriver off my keys. No idea how to get it back on. The hell door?<br />
<b>3:54pm- </b>Starting to think I shouldn’t cut up this pumpkin until there’s someone in the vicinity qualified in first aid.<br />
<b>4:01pm- </b>Have minor celebration after cutting pumpkin in half without causing myself serious injury.<br />
<b>4:23pm- </b>Others arrive. Proceed to sit around kitchen while I make pie.<br />
<b>5:38pm-</b> Celeste is trying to reattach my screwdriver my soldering it. She is soldering it with a match.<br />
<b>5:52pm- </b>Against all odds and using my kitchen scissors, Celeste re-attaches screwdriver.<br />
<b>7:28pm- </b>TARDIS pie made, lounge folded out. Now to try and make the HDMI cable work.<br />
<b>7:35pm- </b>Guess what? Its doesn’t work. Look at my astonishment.<br />
<b>7:47pm- </b>We try to plug a USB into my DVR. It just says, and I quote, “Format noSupport.” I swear at it.<br />
<b>8:01pm- </b>Now watching the episodes on Celeste’s laptop with my CD player plugged in via the AUX cable. Not ideal but I’ve got from episode four on my DVR.<br />
<b>8:03pm-</b> Emma chooses this moment to inform us she just borrowed the DVDs from the library and could have bought them. Collective facepalm.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><b>A CHRISTMAS CAROL</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.boomtron.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/bbc-christmas-carol-doctor-who.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://www.boomtron.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/bbc-christmas-carol-doctor-who.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b>8:12pm- </b>The Doctor has just gone back in time.<br />
Shona-“Is he the kid.”<br />
Celeste- “Yes. The kid is Dumbledore.”<br />
<b>8:25pm-</b> Enter super sexy Kasran.<br />
Alex- “And you can never look at Micheal Gambon quite the same way ever again.”<br />
<b>8:33pm-</b> Shona obviously getting emotional involved.<br />
<b>8:38pm-</b> Shona- “That’s quite a kiss.”<br />
<b>9:16pm- </b>End warm honey and magic. Begin confusion and mind bendy-ness.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><b>THE IMPOSSIBLE ASTRONAUT </b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://blog.stringanomaly.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/doctor-who_the-impossible-astronaut_talking.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://blog.stringanomaly.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/doctor-who_the-impossible-astronaut_talking.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b>9:24pm-</b> Trying to work out the timelines. So this Doctor is at the same point as this River but River is beyond the other Doctor as of…oh god my head hurts.<br />
<b>9:25pm- </b>He’s not 1003. He can’t be.<br />
<b>9:27pm- </b>Watching The Doctor die is actually worse after seeing the rest of the series. Almost believe its real now.<br />
Rachel-"EMOTIONS!”<br />
<b>9:28pm- </b>When the Astronaut is going back into the water River says “of course not.” Why? What does that mean?<br />
<i>*THEORY INTERLUDE- it can’t be River in the spacesuit. Because the River in the spacesuit would have to be BEFORE the River on the beach chronologically. Which means that the River on the beach would know what’s going on and I really don’t think she does.* </i><br />
<b>9:33pm- </b>JIM THE FISH<br />
<b>9:37pm- </b>Rachel has just got glasses to correct moderate to severe blindness<br />
Rachel-“Have I mentioned how much better this is now that I can see his face?”<br />
<b>9:39pm-</b> The genius of Moffat is that this is better now. Richer, deeper, more complex. How is that possible?<br />
<b>9:45pm-</b> River must know. This is River’s childhood. The little girl IS River. River must know.<br />
<b>9:54pm- </b>Alex Kingston is BLOWING MY MIND.<br />
<b>9:59pm-</b> They’re in the warehouse-<br />
Amy-“I’m pregnant.”<br />
Astronaut child-*enters*<br />
Alex-“speak of the devil”<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>DAY OF THE MOON</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.sliverofice.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/day-of-the-moon-rory-listens-to-amy.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://www.sliverofice.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/day-of-the-moon-rory-listens-to-amy.png" width="320" /></a></div><b>10:05pm-</b> The Silence seems to be fairly tied up with the Astronaut child. Who we now know is River. Who is tied up with the eye patch woman…its all linked.<br />
<b>10:11pm-</b> Discussing whether The Doctor knows there’s something wrong with Amy at this point.<br />
Celeste-“Amelia you’re not quiet right.”<br />
Rachel-“You’re made of yoghurt.”<br />
<b>10:14pm-</b> RELEVANT QUESTION IS RELEVANT.<br />
The Doctor- “They got the spacesuit from NASA but where’d they get the girl?”<br />
<b>10:21pm- </b>Creepy orphanage guy says-“The child she must be cared for. Its important. That’s what they said.” Who are they?<br />
<b>10:24pm-</b> Further discussion on Silence vs. Eye patch Woman.<br />
Alex-“Is it possible she was kidnapped from her kidnappers?”<br />
Celeste- “Its like a double negative. It messes with the brain.”<br />
<b>10:28pm-</b> Trust Moffat to put all the mind bendy stuff in the FIRST TWO EPISODES.<br />
The Doctor-“Tell me about the girl? Who is she? Why is she important? What is she for?”<br />
<b>10:41pm-</b> When Rory’s watching River shot The Silence she says- “My old fella didn’t see that did he? He gets ever so cross?” First time ‘round I thought she meant The Doctor.<br />
<b>10:42pm- </b>RIVER PLOT POINT ALERT- “I have a promise to live up to.”<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>THE CURSE OF THE BLACK SPOT</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://i2.cdnds.net/11/17/550w_cult_doctor_who_0603_3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://i2.cdnds.net/11/17/550w_cult_doctor_who_0603_3.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b>11:13pm- </b>Lee Ross comes on screen. I’ve just introduced Rachel to Press Gang.<br />
Alex-“KENNY! KENNY!”<br />
Rachel- “Kenny!”<br />
Celeste-“What?”<br />
Alex- “Shhh! Celeste! Kenny’s face is on the screen! You’ll understand when you’re older.”<br />
<b>11:22pm- </b>The plot holes. God the painful glaring plot holes. The unrealised potential of this episode hurts!<br />
<b>11:25pm-</b> *gurblegarblegaah* What’s that? The sound of me drowning in cliches?<br />
<b>11:30pm- </b>And the Kenny is gone. Why is the Kenny gone?<br />
<b>11:45pm- </b>On Amy's resuscitation technique-<br />
Celeste-"You're doing it wrong!"<br />
Rachel-"She is so doing it wrong."<br />
Alex-"You'd think The Doctor would be qualified to do this kind of thing. Or have a machine or something."<br />
<b>12:02am- </b>Tired but determined. We’re halfway and its only midnight. *giggles in vaguely hysterical fashion*.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>THE DOCTOR’S WIFE</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://i167.photobucket.com/albums/u147/jmctimelord/Doctor%20Who/The-Doctors-Wife.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://i167.photobucket.com/albums/u147/jmctimelord/Doctor%20Who/The-Doctors-Wife.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b>12:06am-</b> We’ve just switched to the TV. The annoying pre-credit sequence wasn’t on the “perfectly legal” BBC versions we’ve been watching. Which means its only on the international version of the show. I call bullshit.<br />
<b>12:12am-</b> On the genius casting of Idris-<br />
Alex- “She’s sexy but she’s not…sexy. You couldn’t cast someone like Karen Gillian.”<br />
Rachel- “A total knockout. No. It wouldn’t work.”<br />
Alex- “Exactly.”<br />
Rachel- “She’s sexy like bowties are sexy.”<br />
<b>12:32am-</b> After Amy looses Rory in the TARDIS for the umpteenth time-<br />
Celeste-“This time stay together!”<br />
Alex-“Hold hands even!”<br />
Celeste-“You are married! You’re allowed to do that!”<br />
Rachel-(vaguely scandalised)“In public?!”<br />
<b>12:35am-</b> Amy sticks her hand in the ood beard.<br />
Celeste-“There should be some kind of rule about touching oods in their dangley bits. Oh that sounds bad.”<br />
Rachel- “It probably is bad. She just groped an ood.”<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>THE REBEL FLESH </b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://images.wikia.com/tardis/images/6/66/The-rebel-flesh.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="183" src="http://images.wikia.com/tardis/images/6/66/The-rebel-flesh.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b>12:48am-</b> Rachel is pretty seriously ill. Exhibit A-<br />
Rachel-“This is a pretty good way to spend an evening.”<br />
Alex-“You’re quiet sick.”<br />
Rachel- “This afternoon I had a shower and then I had to have a nap to recover.”<br />
<b>12:50am- </b>Celeste is off doing something. Get bored of waiting.<br />
Alex- “We started without you in the interest of going to bed before dawn.”<br />
<b>12:56am-</b> When Amy works into the room with the flesh-<br />
Rachel- “Family reunion!”<br />
Alex- “I don’t think all the yoghurt is related.”<br />
<b>1:06am- </b>Still conscious. Barely.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>THE ALMOST PEOPLE</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZQO162uNrIg/TeI7uMoUYmI/AAAAAAAAAJ4/QTSLCVe2sZM/s1600/6x06-The-Almost-People-doctor-who-22430364-1280-720.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZQO162uNrIg/TeI7uMoUYmI/AAAAAAAAAJ4/QTSLCVe2sZM/s320/6x06-The-Almost-People-doctor-who-22430364-1280-720.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b>1:36am-</b> Six down. Two to go. I think Rachel and I are the only ones who are fully conscious and she’s slightly feverish. Like she’s shivering. It’s a bit alarming.<br />
<b>1:40am-</b> The logical part of my brain is telling me to watch the last two in the morning. That part of my brain has lost the argument.<br />
<b>1:49am- </b>Doctor Who makes me a bit of an apathetic bitch. There are people in my house trying to sleep. I’m being a very bad host.<br />
<b>2:00am- </b>Remember you are yoghurt and to yoghurt you shall return.<br />
<b>2:10am- </b>There’s a little part of my brain that switches on at about 2am. Its sole purpose is to yell at me thus- WHY ARE YOU STILL AWAKE ALEX! YOU ARE STILL AWAKE! PLEASE STOP BEING AWAKE IMMEDIATELY!<br />
<b>2:17AM-</b> Down to communicating via small emotive noises. And single sentences.<br />
<b>2:27am- </b>Defeated by my DVR. BRB-passing out.<br />
<br />
Basically what happened was this. I thought I had A Good Man Goes to War recorded. It didn’t record. We could have watched it on Celeste’s laptop but it’s password protected and she was pretty unconscious by that stage. So we admitted defeat.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>SATURDAY 27TH </b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>A GOOD MAN GOES TO WAR</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://images.hitfix.com/photos/753779/doctor-who-a-good-man-goes-to-war_article_story_main.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://images.hitfix.com/photos/753779/doctor-who-a-good-man-goes-to-war_article_story_main.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b>3:50pm- </b>At Rachel’s place. Her and I are about to watch the last episode on her laptop. <br />
<b>3:55pm-</b> Rachel still slightly feverish. Me exhausted.<br />
<b>4:01pm-</b> I still believe Doctor Who is the sure for all ills. Having said that Rachel could also do with some serious drugs.<br />
<b>4:05pm- </b>During the battle scene with the Sontaran nurse-<br />
Alex- “Nice bit of gratuitous gravel quarry.”<br />
<b>4:07pm-</b> We decided that Rory going to see River in the Storm Cage must be pretty early in her timeline. Possibly the first time she’s met Rory.<br />
Rachel-“This is so nice. She just wants to tell her father what she did for her birthday.”<br />
<b>4:20pm-</b> Rory hands the baby to Amy-<br />
Rory- “Mrs Williams.”<br />
Rachel- “Mrs Pond.”<br />
Alex- “I wonder what it says on the marriage certificate.”<br />
<b>4:26pm-</b> MATT SMITH MAKES GREAT FACES.<br />
<b>4:31pm-</b> Awkward Doctor sexy talk is awkward.<br />
<b>4:31pm-</b> On Melody Pond-<br />
Alex-“Its such a cute baby. Look at it. Cute.”<br />
Rachel- “It’s a-*voice breaks.* It’s a-*voice breaks.*”<br />
Alex- “Its Amy and Rory’s baby so it has to be cute?”<br />
Rachel- (croakily) “That’s what I was getting at.”<br />
<b>4:45pm-</b> Both of us are so exhausted from the effort of that emotion we need to make a significant nap.<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>FIN.</b></div>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-18936741739540445142011-08-25T14:35:00.001+10:002011-08-25T15:04:19.058+10:00So you want to be a Doctor's Companion?<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://new.assets.thequietus.com/images/articles/902/who3_1229619945_crop_550x394.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="229" src="http://new.assets.thequietus.com/images/articles/902/who3_1229619945_crop_550x394.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">'Oh! Doctor!'</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
Firstly you’re going to have to learn to run in heels. This is, without doubt, the most important skill you can possibly master to prepare yourself for the arrival of that blue box. Running will fill up a lot of your time from now on and, more importantly, sensible shoes are frowned upon. Plus you might have to run for your life at a black tie event.<br />
<br />
During your training be sure to master running not only on solid floors but on grass, mud and the shifting walls of gravel quarries. It is also vitally important that you practice running on metal grills. You will probably have to do this above the flaming heart of an exploding spaceship- getting a heal caught could be disastrous.<br />
<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://cache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/8/2010/12/pertwee19.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://cache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/8/2010/12/pertwee19.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Seriously. Look at those heels.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
You’re going to need to get very fit. Have you ever seen a slightly over weight companion? Unfortunately, no. They’re all in peak physical condition. The Doctor needs them that way. For the running. It’s also a good idea to perfect a style of running that doesn’t make you look like a spastic sea bird. Try for grace and elegance, even when going full pelt. Plus make sure you can maintain this while holding someone’s hand. Don’t want to mess that bit up do we?<br />
You may also need to hold onto small ledges for dear life, so get some upper body strength.<br />
<br />
Your life is going to need to be boring. This is a harsh, but unavoidable, truth. If you get an interesting and satisfying job you’re probably not in with a chance. Same goes for a perfect family and/or social life. He picks people who are generally dissatisfied with their lot in life- who want to escape and leave it all behind. Luckily bad-ass boyfriends seem to be encouraged.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lmxpeb0qvj1qgsxdqo1_500.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lmxpeb0qvj1qgsxdqo1_500.gif" width="207" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">On the subject of total BAMFs.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
Get amazing hair. Apart from granting you general success in life, great hair is a must if you want to be a companion. Especially in his recent incarnations, The Doctor has hair to be reckoned with. Its your job to give him a run for his money.<br />
It’s also worth noting that you may have to run out the door at any given moment, so lengthily beauty routines are out. Take some time learning to look fabulous in record time.<br />
<br />
On that note- buy a dressing gown. You won’t know where, you won’t know when. A dressing gown will help you achieve an attractively dishevelled look in the wee early hours if necessary. Plus if he does rock up at 1AM, you won’t have time to get changed. Blink and you’ll have missed him. <br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAfdR4en7gaSolq9k9Dso2QiMo6dzJlABBacvOnWzTNZlI9K-cQC5TE9LKdVkKmUIDpUvwdMOuL81I2-bQE54m7nhSm3JhIOQVWyyBhrJGoQBsfhUls-laF-EYlELjJgofuaCDEf4nIw/s1600/Karen+Gillan+with+action+figure.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="227" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAfdR4en7gaSolq9k9Dso2QiMo6dzJlABBacvOnWzTNZlI9K-cQC5TE9LKdVkKmUIDpUvwdMOuL81I2-bQE54m7nhSm3JhIOQVWyyBhrJGoQBsfhUls-laF-EYlELjJgofuaCDEf4nIw/s320/Karen+Gillan+with+action+figure.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Karen. Obviously letting the team down.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Now you’re going to need to move to the UK. This is vitally important. Records indicate that being born anywhere other than the British Isles will have already seriously affected your prospects. Living elsewhere more or less kills them dead. So get off your arse and relocate. Preferably somewhere prone to alien invasion.<br />
<br />
Now wait. And listen. <br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lnqy4e1pD51qgcr3ao1_400.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lnqy4e1pD51qgcr3ao1_400.gif" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Vroom...vroom...vroom.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-12550103471024285642011-07-02T19:57:00.002+10:002011-07-02T20:04:30.999+10:00Pick me up.*<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkaz99Ydbg1qz4fv0o1_500.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="245" src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkaz99Ydbg1qz4fv0o1_500.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Asking me to play Trivial Pursuit is almost definitely worth a crack. </span></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Ah pick-up lines. There’s a lot of them floating around<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">1</span>. Despite various advances in social graces apparently people still use them. Totally ignoring to fact that the best way to pick someone up is almost certainly to go up and say hi and also that I’m probably the last person you should be asking for advice in this department, I have compiled a list. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Here is a short collection of pick-up lines from texts of note<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">2</span>. If someone tried to use any one of these on me, in the correct situation and using the correct wording (misquoting is obviously a turn-off), it would almost certainly warrant my attention. Not least of which because said person is showing some creativity and a knowledge of obscure popular culture<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">3</span>.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><i>I’m certifiably crazy about you. I’ll be your name I’m muttering when they take away my shoe laces.</i> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">(Press Gang)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Obviously this would be coming on a bit strong right off the cuff but you could probably work it into conversation slightly later in the evening when everyone’s a bit inebriated. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><i>Get your coat. You’ve pulled. </i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">(Ashes to Ashes)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I don’t think this would work in every situation but done right- this would work. Yes this would work. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><i>Hey is this guy boring you? Why don’t you come and talk to me instead? I’m from a different planet. Seriously. Want to see my spaceship?</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">(Hitchhiker)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Still find it slightly baffling why a lovely and intelligent girl like Trillian chose to run away with someone like Zaphod? He had a spaceship people. A spaceship. Case closed.<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">5</span> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><i>Let’s go somewhere. Madagascar. I want to go somewhere I’ve never been and I’d like to go with you.</i> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">(Hitchhiker)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Please note that I’d easily be able to do Arthur’s lines from memory if someone initiated this.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><i>Other planets? Want to see some?</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">(Doctor Who)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">This is a pick-up line. I don’t care if Eleven said it to Amy with totally platonic intention IT IS A PICK-UP LINE. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I’ve saved the best for last. It’s a Press Gang one<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">6</span>. This is arguably the greatest pick up line in existence- </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><i>Hey, can I tell you something. I mean, this might be a bit embarrassing coming from a guy you've just met and everything, but, I really think you should know. Say this was like the olden days, you know, thousands and thousands of years ago...I'd kill a dragon for you. No really, I would. I'd go right out there and I'd kill one. In fact, I'll make you an offer. If you'll go out with me some night this week, I'll make a definite commitment to kill the first dragon that I see. </i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Obviously it is now your turn. Favourite fictional pick-up line in the comments. GO!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">*I apologise for the title pun. It was irresistible. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">1- For your reference, my favourite non-fictional pick-up line is as follows- <i>Nice shoes. Let’s f*ck.</i> Its got everything- confidence, absurdity and also shoes. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">2- And by “note” I mean “that Alex likes very much.” Obviously. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">3- Or that they read my blog. But that’s far less impressive. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">4- This is not the footnote you're looking for!</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">5- Ok so ARGUABLY there’s more to it than that. But I don’t think Douglas Adams ever intended us to delve too deeply into the sex lives of his characters. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">6-Another one, I know. To be honest if you studied the actions of Spike Thompson you could probably get me wrapped ‘round your little finger.</span></div>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-62622088015055354042011-06-05T15:41:00.000+10:002011-06-05T15:41:28.111+10:00This is where it gets complicated.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEik3inI5WOlNX9r0AMvEvy5MpHh4j4DTRKfHyjDk276Svk4D_dORfnmI0aTFMJClLtdjTL1uU6pIRI0_yRWo_aLdSbhB1oTpN1neoNqctq3-7m6PycfND-SIqXRJM1h57cTecrZIaLaFMae/s400/The+Almost+People+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEik3inI5WOlNX9r0AMvEvy5MpHh4j4DTRKfHyjDk276Svk4D_dORfnmI0aTFMJClLtdjTL1uU6pIRI0_yRWo_aLdSbhB1oTpN1neoNqctq3-7m6PycfND-SIqXRJM1h57cTecrZIaLaFMae/s400/The+Almost+People+2.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Accurate facial expression is accurate. </td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
And so it begins.<br />
<br />
<i>A Good Man Goes to War</i> has officially aired in the UK and US. It’s out there. Floating around the internet like a giant glob of red dye, leaving ugly stains wherever it connects with something else. This week is, for those of us operating in <a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2011/04/campaign-for-real-time.html">Real Time</a>, not going to be easy.<br />
<br />
In the half hour I was on the internet this morning I had two close encounters during which I made a strangled noise and rapidly closed a tab. And I didn’t even go anywhere dangerous. Most of the internet is now off limits.<br />
<br />
I have to go to<a href="http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Weasley-Jumpers/114243028658950?ref=ts"> Quidditch </a>on Monday and there’s a seriously high chance that at least two of my team mates will have seen it. The next seven days will feature a lot of singing loudly and punching people until they shut up. I have no doubt.<br />
<br />
<i>The Almost People </i>was bad enough. It marks something of a milestone. Progressing from the numerous <a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2011/01/moffism.html">mental</a>, <a href="http://adventures-in-tv-land.blogspot.com/2010/09/there-are-crocodiles.html">emotional</a> and <a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2010/10/sherlock-3.html">physiological </a>scars which he is responsible for, Steven Moffat actually caused me physical harm.<br />
<br />
Following last night’s episode I was leaping around the lounge room trying to dispel some of the enormous amount of pent up EMOTION I’d suddenly been furnished with, when I connected with the lounge. I am therefore, holding Mr Steven Moffat Sir personally accountable for the large bruise on my upper thigh.<br />
That right there is some pretty powerfully scripting sir. I salute you.<br />
<br />
I really want to go back and watch the full series again. I feel as though, by not being in the right mood for it, I did <i><a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2011/05/impossible-astronaut.html">The Impossible Astronaut</a></i> a serious disservice. This series has the makings of being the best ever. As much as a adore series 5, and it will always hold a special place, series 6 is already so much more. Moffat (and co) have once again proved me wrong. Never, ever underestimate or doubt him. He is God after all. <br />
<br />
<b>THEORY ALERT</b><br />
This is a week when speculation is both almost irresistible and very, very dangerous. But here’s a few things that I think won’t change by next week.<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">(WHO AM I KIDDING? NEXT WEEK IS WHEN EVERYTHING CHANGES!)</span></div><br />
1- I know there’s absolutely nothing worse than people with theories who feel the need to have their ‘I told you so’ moment but…<a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2011/05/curse-of-black-spot.html">space midwife</a>. Just saying.<br />
<br />
2- I think<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51JtuEa_OPc&feature=grec_index"> <i>Space</i></a> and <i><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkmiefoRcfU&NR=1">Time</a></i> need re-watching. I know they were stand alone mini-episodes but I think there are clues hidden there. They were the first moment when Amy showed sighs that something was wrong.<br />
<br />
3- Going right back to the <a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2011/04/possibly-cactus.html">series trailer</a>- the scenes with the creepy dolls do not have Amy in them.<br />
<br />
4- The Doctor and his Ganger discussed cybermats. With almost no context. There was just a random throw away reference to a cybermat. Can everyone say PLOT POINT?<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_Act2L6PEjkoYa00R6nL6k1C6FBA9TmMvAt9LPBR6dIdjZcsKRWlqCM-IezUzqS_TI90CknfPOYTgiLg5Id9gRp2sb90z1HTksTE7Luw4ltZGQaf_ALVDzlJLQC_M3273hzoFH_0xO6Q/s1600/cybermat.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="227" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_Act2L6PEjkoYa00R6nL6k1C6FBA9TmMvAt9LPBR6dIdjZcsKRWlqCM-IezUzqS_TI90CknfPOYTgiLg5Id9gRp2sb90z1HTksTE7Luw4ltZGQaf_ALVDzlJLQC_M3273hzoFH_0xO6Q/s320/cybermat.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">If you're adverse to the teaser kind of spoilers- don't look at this picture. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> </span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-33281822721748453012011-05-29T17:09:00.003+10:002011-06-05T15:45:41.144+10:00Doctor Who writers- a spotters guide<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Steven Moffat </b><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ3KBRMhQzGGhsYEsT2QZMCFSQ2ibEiPRQHHRGOwJxsq-QDprNjHD7tnT8lw1yU09c00cAVYrj_m998A5Gc9s-xyiufMei8ezWx-aOyazAwETiffoMaiAy8eNeq0SM-WYSFCL-mGcOPbPQ/s1600/steven-moffat-dalek.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ3KBRMhQzGGhsYEsT2QZMCFSQ2ibEiPRQHHRGOwJxsq-QDprNjHD7tnT8lw1yU09c00cAVYrj_m998A5Gc9s-xyiufMei8ezWx-aOyazAwETiffoMaiAy8eNeq0SM-WYSFCL-mGcOPbPQ/s320/steven-moffat-dalek.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pictured here with a dalek</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b><br />
</b></div><b>Which episodes has he written?</b><br />
1- The Impossible Astronaut<br />
2- Day of the Moon<br />
7- A Good Man Goes to War<br />
Plus episodes 8 and 13 (titles TBC)<br />
<br />
<b>What do I know him from?</b><br />
Being God? Apart from being the current Head Writer, Moffat has written all the best episodes the series has served up since 2005. He’s the co-creator of Sherlock. You all know who Moffat is.<br />
<br />
<b>Is he any good?</b><br />
Is this a trick question?<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Stephen Thompson</b><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://media.onsugar.com/files/2010/12/50/3/362/3626356/6bc314cd714097b5_albinomale1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://media.onsugar.com/files/2010/12/50/3/362/3626356/6bc314cd714097b5_albinomale1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Steve has the unfortunate affliction of a creepy albino Googleganger. </td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
</div><b>Which episode has it written?</b><br />
3- The Curse of the Black Spot<br />
<br />
<b>What do I know him from?</b><br />
He wrote <i>The Blind Banker</i>. Otherwise known as “the other episode” in the first season of Sherlock.<br />
<br />
<b>Is he any good?</b><br />
He must be. That’s what baffles me. He MUST have something going for him to be asked to write Sherlock. I think the poor guy is getting a bad rap. If <i>The Blink Banker</i> hadn’t been wedged between <i>A Study in Pink </i>and <i>The Great Gam</i>e it wouldn’t have paled so much. And <i>Curse of the Black</i> spot was GOOD. But it wasn’t great.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Neil Gaiman </b><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_liem9sWKih1qchwd9o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_liem9sWKih1qchwd9o1_500.jpg" width="239" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pictured not blinking.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b><br />
</b></div><b>Which episode has he written?</b><br />
4- The Doctor’s Wife<br />
<br />
<b>What do I know him from?</b><br />
Neil Gaiman seems to be one of those people. You know. Everyone knows who is his but when asked what he’s actually written people tend to say “He’s Neil Gaiman!”<br />
I know him from an amazing movie called <i>Mirror Mask</i> but he’s written truck loads of cool stuff. Plus he’s married to Amanda Palmer.<br />
<br />
<b>Is he any good?</b><br />
Did you watch <i>The Doctor’s Wife</i>? I don’t feel like I can say Moffat’s written all the best episodes now because he hasn’t. That episode will go down in Who history, it already has.<br />
I wouldn’t be at all surprised if we see more Gaiman episodes in the future.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Matthew Graham </b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01755/mars_1755820c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01755/mars_1755820c.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pictured looking rather too much like Gene Hunt</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b><br />
</b></div><b>Which episodes has he written?</b><br />
5- The Rebel Flesh<br />
6- The Almost People<br />
<br />
<b>What do I know him from?</b><br />
He’s the co-creator of <i>Ashes to Ashes</i> and <i>Life on Mars</i> (and yes, I’m aware I’m the only person alive who lists them in that order). So he’s got some serious time travel credentials.<br />
<br />
<b>Is he any good?</b><br />
Yes. That’s the simple answer. I enjoyed <i>The Rebel Flesh</i> enormously. I think its one of the strongest episodes the series has served up this year (can we just take <i>The Doctor’s Wife</i> out of the equation? Its very difficult to talk about the other episodes beside that one). It was scary and witty and clever. I’m impressed.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Mark Gatiss</b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l6zqeluyz91qbg82jo1_500.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="179" src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l6zqeluyz91qbg82jo1_500.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pictured here looking frightened. Possibly of his own creepy dolls.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
</div><b>Which episodes has he written?</b><br />
Episode 9<br />
<br />
<b>What do I know him from?</b><br />
Going way back he wrote <i>The Unquiet Dead</i> (the one in series one with Charles Dickens and Gwen Cooper in it) and <i>The Idiots Lantern</i> (Queen’s coronation, television that wants to kill people, street party). He also wrote <i>Victory of the Daleks</i>. You know, that one with Winston Churchill. Plus he’s the co creator of <i>Sherlock </i>and wrote <i>The Great Game</i>. Oh, and he plays Mycroft.<br />
<br />
<b>Is he any good?</b><br />
Did you just read that? Yes. He’s pretty good.<br />
<br />
<b>Speculation?</b><br />
Its been confirmed that this is the episode with the creepy dolls from the trailer. It was originally in the first block but was moved across. The last I heard it was called something like “What little boys are made of.”<br />
I think it’ll be properly creepy. That might just be my fear of the dolls talking.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Tom MacRae </b><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/archive/5/58/20060508224708!Tom_macrae.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/archive/5/58/20060508224708!Tom_macrae.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pictured with silly haircut and Transformer. </td></tr>
</tbody></table><b><br />
</b></div><b>Which episode has he written?</b><br />
Episode 10<br />
<br />
<b>What do I know him from?</b><br />
He wrote <i>Rise of the Cybermen</i> and <i>Age of Steel</i> back in Martha’s day. Those were the ones with all the blimps when Mickey was trying to be a BAMF.<br />
<br />
<b>Is he any good?</b><br />
We don’t really have a lot to go off. Those two episodes were kind of forgettable really. I thought they were silly but I always attributed that to Russel and his parallel universe story arc.<br />
<br />
<b>Speculation?</b><br />
None at all. Maybe Nazis. They’ve got to crush Nazis in there somewhere but I am (for absolutely no reason at all) tipping Gatiss to have those.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Toby Whithouse </b><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://doktorkto.ru/wp-content/uploads/Toby-Whithouse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="317" src="http://doktorkto.ru/wp-content/uploads/Toby-Whithouse.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pictured with a bottle of water.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b><br />
</b></div><b>Which episode has he written?</b><br />
The God Complex (episode 11)<br />
<br />
<b>What do I know him from?</b><br />
He wrote <i>School Reunion</i> (Sarah Jane and K9) way back and last series he penned <i>Vampires in Venice </i>(remember the one with the vampires? In Venice?). He’s also the creator of the excellent <i>Being Human.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Is he any good?</b><br />
I’ve got a weird relationship with Toby Whithouse. I really love his work (I retain that <i>Being Human</i> deserved way more attention) but at the same time… he’s a bit rubbish at endings. The finale of every season of <i>Being Human</i> manages to be kind of disappointing. Despite some amazing moments, <i>Vampires in Venice</i> did end up with The Doctor climbing a tower in a storm. I think he’s strongest when he’s writing character based dialogue scenes.<br />
<br />
<b>Speculation?</b><br />
Have you not noticed the running thread in all his writing? There will be vampires. If there is not at least a little bit of vampires then I will eat my fez.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Gareth Roberts </b><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/images/173/gareth_roberts.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/images/173/gareth_roberts.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pictured looking slightly like an evil mastermind.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b><br />
</b></div><b>Which episode has he written?</b><br />
Episode 12<br />
<br />
<b>What do I know him from?</b><br />
He wrote <i>The Shakespeare Code </i>and <i>The Unicorn and the Wasp</i>. He then did a massive back-flip from those pretty ok historical episodes to write <i>The Lodger.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Is he any good?</b><br />
Go watch <i>The Lodger</i> again. It is seriously wonderful. It features Matt Smith feeding someone out of a tea pot. And also being naked. And I WAS NOT EXPECTING THIS! If I didn’t have such a fondness for <i>The Eleventh Hour, </i>I’d say it was the best episode in series 5.<br />
<br />
<b>Speculation?</b><br />
This is almost certainly the episode with THAT coat and Craig and the cybermat. Oh and the baby. If you don’t know what I’m on about see <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZUQG9aTglNg&feature=related">this video</a>.<br />
We know this is some kind of follow up to The Lodger. We know Craig Owens will return and there is word that The Doctor will be working in a shop.<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>Why are there no female writers in this list?</b><br />
If you type "why are there no female Doctor Who writers?" into Google images you get this picture of Rory looking sad.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.diffcon.co.uk/wp-content/gallery/test/tumblr_lbeihh3kmz1qed3edo1_1280.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://www.diffcon.co.uk/wp-content/gallery/test/tumblr_lbeihh3kmz1qed3edo1_1280.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-55816623549332994752011-05-26T19:35:00.002+10:002011-05-26T19:52:51.811+10:00TARDIS pie- two variations<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDXbXsVmMeEzCnjUfd7fN-P2TQGZBe8YBqCMG4IfpqJIfA4KiXoXfEww-QLDggnIkRGXct9CNKmR9lO84dZdQ2mPNEFy9dlow_SALPocYT9YFggJU3jbMo5NQy0P2X8vuoGwblnQChsS0/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+035.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDXbXsVmMeEzCnjUfd7fN-P2TQGZBe8YBqCMG4IfpqJIfA4KiXoXfEww-QLDggnIkRGXct9CNKmR9lO84dZdQ2mPNEFy9dlow_SALPocYT9YFggJU3jbMo5NQy0P2X8vuoGwblnQChsS0/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+035.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Tastier on the inside.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>VEGETARIAN TARDIS PIE</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">By popular demand, here is meat-free variation for meat-free Whovians. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Its potato, leek and mushroom. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>TIMING</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">This one takes a bit less time than the meat version but the pie still needs to cook for at least an hour. So if you want to eat before the episode starts, start cooking at least two and a half hours before.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkkNec7oX4LwFNXc6VAoorFap4v0i6yB7iI3ZB4pOSIRSdIft7uA43-oH9b1-R4cWGuPjjcrQtzIPRFKz5gReWs7upnbEJp4twDFdWHmvaF6-Rr4K-HDeq9UiDU_LAY8EsrO2mjumrs6I/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+002.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkkNec7oX4LwFNXc6VAoorFap4v0i6yB7iI3ZB4pOSIRSdIft7uA43-oH9b1-R4cWGuPjjcrQtzIPRFKz5gReWs7upnbEJp4twDFdWHmvaF6-Rr4K-HDeq9UiDU_LAY8EsrO2mjumrs6I/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+002.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You can see the REDUCED stickers. Cheapskate and proud. </td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>INGREDIENTS</b> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Potato</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Mushrooms*</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Onion</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Garlic</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Cream</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Short crust pastry</div><i>A NOTE ON MUSHROOMS-</i><br />
I used a combination of button and Swiss browns. The reason for this was that when I went shopping to buy ingredients both these varieties had large, tempting REDUCED stickers on them. Also Swiss browns claim to be "meaty" and I thought that might be called for. You could use pretty much whatever sort you like. But probably not those weird stringy Japanese ones.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkpqoPOkFxxK6y_-HevAfprpd4AcE78H2VGqdDwaL70f_GFEpVmKh0p39rIqaGaCq2dZ7u8n2VLCGtP3vfCKYTe4k_DGKCeoxCOLL9sff7RulPSgjnKvg3lxXHer4LC82IUvGNitL-eKM/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+004.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkpqoPOkFxxK6y_-HevAfprpd4AcE78H2VGqdDwaL70f_GFEpVmKh0p39rIqaGaCq2dZ7u8n2VLCGtP3vfCKYTe4k_DGKCeoxCOLL9sff7RulPSgjnKvg3lxXHer4LC82IUvGNitL-eKM/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+004.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And if you don't like mushrooms? You are silly.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">1- Chop all ingredients, slicing the potato into thin strips.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnZdxmLtSu__1pBWinl3lM4jN5T6Wfw-TUpwzptbFf7lPA8pxO4l0aPg5LGtJKcAY0u5aJ40hKYCcXawGTPmuBhz6tF5HVxMYuaElIqrx-sVhtYsHn463Kp5_reBDU32ijhlQe78Pfb60/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+003.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnZdxmLtSu__1pBWinl3lM4jN5T6Wfw-TUpwzptbFf7lPA8pxO4l0aPg5LGtJKcAY0u5aJ40hKYCcXawGTPmuBhz6tF5HVxMYuaElIqrx-sVhtYsHn463Kp5_reBDU32ijhlQe78Pfb60/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+003.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This one LOOKS a lot prettier than the meat version</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">2- Sauté the onion and garlic until soft then add the mushrooms. </div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_FUUl7koUFKrQ7S6Z4IYkX7ZiWea_5PiqAJhSE9KOJ8Ll_dR0hnE1xoFe2dD_Hxzxa7plD4_rAX4Rxwn9H33T6N-aZja10ART0W-5h5-X76uDfwhKkIK12iXQUWG3XLDVljMAyM8Xwyw/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_FUUl7koUFKrQ7S6Z4IYkX7ZiWea_5PiqAJhSE9KOJ8Ll_dR0hnE1xoFe2dD_Hxzxa7plD4_rAX4Rxwn9H33T6N-aZja10ART0W-5h5-X76uDfwhKkIK12iXQUWG3XLDVljMAyM8Xwyw/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+005.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sauté people. Fancy.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">3- Add potato, then leek. Cook until combined. </div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFQEnHEutPzuGyEv1qXHaFzlpAoW7n7ve2uiFk5qWmllJ3gMUnLmjjwJRPhWu-xFy3Jx4-YGVWFlis-hMB71-1c5dQ5pzjR-JksFAL84kTdNR39TRefAAB-ZK-5hV6p19vS0LFZRVX3VA/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFQEnHEutPzuGyEv1qXHaFzlpAoW7n7ve2uiFk5qWmllJ3gMUnLmjjwJRPhWu-xFy3Jx4-YGVWFlis-hMB71-1c5dQ5pzjR-JksFAL84kTdNR39TRefAAB-ZK-5hV6p19vS0LFZRVX3VA/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+006.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It just looks good for you...</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">4- Add cream. You'll need enough for there to be some sauce but not so much that its sloppy. </div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaInn9OOLNj4JJAMBn3C3TOLTMDIN6ri0Nwgjw_7Tfo5OlQj0YoqjtyiW4ple-jMJPbVy5YDR7K7gKlhmuBRXkUhOPyaUd2GLVmHrCguiDdhczgL3hSIbfdJXXpNJZ7nHumqc7xPFo1CM/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+007.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaInn9OOLNj4JJAMBn3C3TOLTMDIN6ri0Nwgjw_7Tfo5OlQj0YoqjtyiW4ple-jMJPbVy5YDR7K7gKlhmuBRXkUhOPyaUd2GLVmHrCguiDdhczgL3hSIbfdJXXpNJZ7nHumqc7xPFo1CM/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+007.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">...and then you add cream.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">5- Cover and cook on low until the potato is soft.</div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-fW1vlcAzzZ58H8AV-hpUxxaomMLVyW_3Xa_wAsyNRgdBE8rCzzQD1qePaIPhbK621Lj3nKTaqGGG6xKwLKoUM4LrGq73P50CKSZiGVirdKcJShaG0lq1c3-TB5QBJyzYcvs4qDG2ewY/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+008.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-fW1vlcAzzZ58H8AV-hpUxxaomMLVyW_3Xa_wAsyNRgdBE8rCzzQD1qePaIPhbK621Lj3nKTaqGGG6xKwLKoUM4LrGq73P50CKSZiGVirdKcJShaG0lq1c3-TB5QBJyzYcvs4qDG2ewY/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+008.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">And suddenly its not pretty any more.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">6- Follow instructions as <a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2011/05/tardis-pie.html">per regular TARDIS pie.</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>SOME NOTES ON THE TARDIS PIE MODEL</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">It is defiantly a good idea to bind the exterior bits to your base pastry. I've tried milk and egg and egg is much better. If you brush a little egg on the back of each piece of pastry before you press it on, the whole thing will stay together a lot better during baking.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">You'll also notice I've started adding a line down the centre of the doors. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">The more you practice, the better the pies look.</div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDO6ZN1w87fgem45v0xuXTv_BLWG4G-KQQy0eyBhoxqba3x6Ey1ft-WWYcfnJ5SL2eZv_Lt3EJIINIOhbEsvc14R4Yl_lj4Hdb1hyphenhyphenUJjKTTPnE-VhAzj3QiYy7e9VLyxI7YHACp3AjxY4/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDO6ZN1w87fgem45v0xuXTv_BLWG4G-KQQy0eyBhoxqba3x6Ey1ft-WWYcfnJ5SL2eZv_Lt3EJIINIOhbEsvc14R4Yl_lj4Hdb1hyphenhyphenUJjKTTPnE-VhAzj3QiYy7e9VLyxI7YHACp3AjxY4/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+018.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">No, they aren't BIGGER on the inside. Please stop asking.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>APPLE TARDIS PIE</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">This is my favourite sort so far. Seriously, its glorious. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><i>NOTE</i>- I wouldn't recommend having TARDIS pie for two courses. You would probably explode.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>TIMING</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">This one's a little different in that I was aiming to eat it AFTER the episode. So I started cooking about an hour before and put the pie in the oven when the episode started. It was perfectly ready after 45 minutes (these are smaller than the savoury ones).</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib2G7alH2ZfhqeYPje5ucf8Q2b3wTgI_11rZ8Q-Dves2hFUQxzTFge-FHEWlJjIuBdhEzc8r1JqQTg2_BuUWuJkScdZTIzXjN6VB3dUt6CWugNPFCYVBPe6_995Fbsr4JN0IKz2M-tJlo/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+019.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib2G7alH2ZfhqeYPje5ucf8Q2b3wTgI_11rZ8Q-Dves2hFUQxzTFge-FHEWlJjIuBdhEzc8r1JqQTg2_BuUWuJkScdZTIzXjN6VB3dUt6CWugNPFCYVBPe6_995Fbsr4JN0IKz2M-tJlo/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+019.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Apples still count as a serve of fruit when stewed in butter and sugar right?</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>INGREDIENTS</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Apple</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Butter</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Brown sugar </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Cinnamon and/or nutmeg </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Short crust pastry</div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjp1xSUU7gx-InBV0u61wMqHUW7BTpN9JBTcvFO-PDamYlpdCSouz7HpFxQ-V2QqB2SOitykfJNG_vZT5ABCXE2ZDROQAOeWzqjncB_QAekyo0bkov_KOzyBCsPxbD_PWTYalz9EzPH4g/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+021.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjp1xSUU7gx-InBV0u61wMqHUW7BTpN9JBTcvFO-PDamYlpdCSouz7HpFxQ-V2QqB2SOitykfJNG_vZT5ABCXE2ZDROQAOeWzqjncB_QAekyo0bkov_KOzyBCsPxbD_PWTYalz9EzPH4g/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+021.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Whatever kind of apple you like, by the way.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">1- I was going to say 'slice to apple into small cube type shapes' then I realised cooking has invented a work for that. Its called cubing. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">2- Put the apple in the pan. Add a decent lump of butter. Don't be stingy. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">You can go for a jog later.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">3- Add a couple of spoons of brown sugar and a little water. Mix. </div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaGd6gbJGIU0e5tXj2mg2SgAMobsQJYhkr_eUTQAmry4M5IHjwYiTi7bejSrSf_vGbLd2KBVKBlNj7yl23hUyhYEKQnBacW4NQTMqpCjFL7V3wpreEJHtexCM94AAndkU57uzzdEN5ewU/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+022.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaGd6gbJGIU0e5tXj2mg2SgAMobsQJYhkr_eUTQAmry4M5IHjwYiTi7bejSrSf_vGbLd2KBVKBlNj7yl23hUyhYEKQnBacW4NQTMqpCjFL7V3wpreEJHtexCM94AAndkU57uzzdEN5ewU/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+022.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The spices are kind of optional. Except they aren't. Add them.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">4- Add all your spices.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">5- Cover and cook on low, stirring occasionally, until the sauce is thick and syrupy. </div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibdhnaokit62HlLuVG3MyhqSjlniP8roNiJCd8IOoRsPyEb98KbRhFB2IgiAi_fWpyTZ2-nkWCxLodbx2oUsJhQArDq1dagmLYcSlD2ZtU85O7xwSSVeFriM9C4Yion-cjiLPGOrZheVI/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+024.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibdhnaokit62HlLuVG3MyhqSjlniP8roNiJCd8IOoRsPyEb98KbRhFB2IgiAi_fWpyTZ2-nkWCxLodbx2oUsJhQArDq1dagmLYcSlD2ZtU85O7xwSSVeFriM9C4Yion-cjiLPGOrZheVI/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+024.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">See how its kind of a little bit like toffee?</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">6- Follow instructions as per <a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2011/05/tardis-pie.html">regular TARDIS pie.</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> I recommend making these ones smaller though, about half the size. </div><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifsEdAitRgbgUFnDQvc2AdEhUG4LCFODq7UUR3vGJOPkS7bdm1z7DuBCdrLbcoSr832hE1kWolJp7Fc0O1KTjVxeSDVPd2bPabbNjNgItgNtjnfaRf-mhebpvft9Bb4Gr9pRLyQYPdLas/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+027.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifsEdAitRgbgUFnDQvc2AdEhUG4LCFODq7UUR3vGJOPkS7bdm1z7DuBCdrLbcoSr832hE1kWolJp7Fc0O1KTjVxeSDVPd2bPabbNjNgItgNtjnfaRf-mhebpvft9Bb4Gr9pRLyQYPdLas/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+027.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Its how Eleven would whip his cream.</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">7- Serve with whipped cream. If you have an old-school hand beater, use that.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> Its feels very TARDIS-y. </div><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuvRG9aW5J5VGEDc0ODjIHMdYDeumvSlRQ9kjeU4ZJZUC1gJBTEsIej5QCbUwueNw3aDOoYE3wusSUQK9ve9GsPwn7E8iwrmdWQ8xvlSC9gOt8BR0ZzDyz2_PZfkvSd4gquO4_0Hf_f0E/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+033.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuvRG9aW5J5VGEDc0ODjIHMdYDeumvSlRQ9kjeU4ZJZUC1gJBTEsIej5QCbUwueNw3aDOoYE3wusSUQK9ve9GsPwn7E8iwrmdWQ8xvlSC9gOt8BR0ZzDyz2_PZfkvSd4gquO4_0Hf_f0E/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+033.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I cannot tell you how good this one is. Seriously. MAKE ONE.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div><b>THEORY ALERT!</b><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;">Everything tastes better when you put it in a pie shaped like a TARDIS.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div></div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;">I'm looking for suggestions for other types of filling. </div></div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;">We've got three episodes to go in this block. So that's three more kinds of pie. </div></div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;">Thoughts?</div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm thinking a berry one because the apple is so good. Also chicken.</div><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7cgLp_BylFN0gVa_OEXJxfoRcSBKAM6kNO4iFw5dJEOWEyM_xa3d8OkXKnp8fMqfZEvXOj2DqM1QgQU-mJAHSg3v7BRVDi5mj9fgmqVquA60lKF5EmJ0ZGWYY9PGkVLGIvGbsSKm8b7U/s1600/TARDIS+pie+variations+029.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7cgLp_BylFN0gVa_OEXJxfoRcSBKAM6kNO4iFw5dJEOWEyM_xa3d8OkXKnp8fMqfZEvXOj2DqM1QgQU-mJAHSg3v7BRVDi5mj9fgmqVquA60lKF5EmJ0ZGWYY9PGkVLGIvGbsSKm8b7U/s320/TARDIS+pie+variations+029.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Please note- its a little bit weird eating TARDIS pie after watching <i>The Doctor's Wife.</i></td></tr>
</tbody></table></div>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-29909386981013221592011-05-22T19:02:00.000+10:002011-05-22T19:02:15.544+10:00The Doctor's Wife<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a293/toolbox1234/the-doctors-wife-next-time-8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a293/toolbox1234/the-doctors-wife-next-time-8.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">For an episode that was so damn pretty, <br />
it was stupidly difficult to find a decent picture</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
You know when you love something so much that it feels as though your heart is going to explode? Like its, quite literally, bigger on the inside and your chest won‘t be able to hold it forever?<br />
<br />
That was so much more than magic and honey.<br />
<br />
To accurately summarise my feelings about The Doctor’s Wife I shall recount a text conversation I had with beccamarsh shortly after the credits-<br />
“I HAVE NO WORDS.”<br />
“I’ve got a few words- Neil. F*cking. Gaiman.”<br />
<br />
This won’t be a long post because I can’t do that episode justice. It’s a bit like the Ashes’ finale in that, to describe it without gleeful noises, grins and enthusiastic hand gestures seems ridiculous. Very rarely does television make me actually cry out with sheer joy. That did. At least twice.<br />
<br />
I wrote a bunch of paragraphs in this space but none of them seemed right so I deleted them. I have so much to say that I can’t say any of it.<br />
<br />
Basically that was glorious. Proper, delightful, bigger-on-the-inside glorious.<br />
<br />
I bloody love Doctor Who.<br />
<br />
<b>THEORY ALERT</b><br />
The biggest plot point in that episode, in case you missed it, was this-<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>The only water in the forest is the river…</i></div><br />
Lets just think about that sentence for a moment. It contains one very, very important word. Shall I tell you what it is?<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">River. </div><div><br />
</div>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-40856006132664264092011-05-15T19:50:00.002+10:002011-06-05T15:47:31.827+10:00The curse of the black spot<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFKd0H-5l2biRPva0xu0pGZERrZdjy7hWmgUmIgYI75QunZJBaE0U9mModm3rBQ2FMnLXAx9x2QdlFNTEFjNoHqldd5XL2Z5uPuc4cCa-BiJEVXXHUZR-rTtUWElj5OJa4E0eWWf3S2KU/s1600/doctor-who-the-curse-of-the-black-spot-promo-batch-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFKd0H-5l2biRPva0xu0pGZERrZdjy7hWmgUmIgYI75QunZJBaE0U9mModm3rBQ2FMnLXAx9x2QdlFNTEFjNoHqldd5XL2Z5uPuc4cCa-BiJEVXXHUZR-rTtUWElj5OJa4E0eWWf3S2KU/s320/doctor-who-the-curse-of-the-black-spot-promo-batch-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
It’s occurred to me that when you have very high expectations of a thing, it becomes very difficult for that thing to surpass those expectations.<br />
<br />
The expectations I had placed on Curse of the Black Spot were enormous. I mean come on! It was Doctor Who. With pirates. Those are two of my most favourite things. For a long time an episode about pirates was my hypothetical episode (were Steven Moffat ever to sweep out of the sky and offer me a writing gig). All this excitement was only accentuated when I found out Lee Ross was going to be in the episode (he’s from Press Gang, just go with it). There was a few days last year, when all these details came to light, that I was so excited I almost couldn’t function.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.bleedingcool.com/wp-content/uploads//2011/05/d71.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="189" src="http://www.bleedingcool.com/wp-content/uploads//2011/05/d71.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lee Ross is pretty amazing. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>So did I like the episode? Yes. I did like it. Was it THE GREATEST EPISODE EVER OF ALL TIME? No. Not really. It was just a rather good episode. And rather good is rather good. it’s a bit like life really, being disappointed with contentedness because it isn’t joy is ridiculous.<br />
<br />
Existential angst aside. I thought it was all quite clever. The dialogue (though a bit quick at times) was funny and suitably littered with pirate slang. Plus the plot was very Who. Aliens entering our world from a parallel dimension using mirrors? Sound familiar?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://practicalenrichment.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/dw_girl-in-the-fireplace_white-horse1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="193" src="http://practicalenrichment.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/dw_girl-in-the-fireplace_white-horse1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
Here’s the MAIN problem I had with the episode- what happened to the Boatswain? Seriously. The Boatswain (who I shall hence forth refer to as Kenny for reasons you may or may not understand) was in the magazine with Amy, Rory and Toby. Toby cuts his hand. Mulligan bails on them. Cut to The Doctor and Avery. When The Doctor and Avery return to the magazine THERE IS NO KENNY! What happened to him? The Siren didn’t come and get him? But she must of. When did that happen? Did you think we weren’t paying any attention to the minor character?! Well then why cast LEE ROSS?!<br />
<br />
Basically that plot hole drove me almost completely nuts. To the point that I was lying awake last night trying to work out if I’d missed something. That kind of inconstancy is not what I expect from Doctor Who. Tsk.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkwfdmWrSh1qawm5mo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="223" src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkwfdmWrSh1qawm5mo1_500.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is my new favourite picture of all time ever.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>All the other issue I have are silly things relating the pirate reality vs. pirate fact. These are the kind of problems I have with almost every pirate themed thing ever (with the honourable exception of Muppet Treasure Island). Pirates never did the walking the plank thing. It annoys me but I can understand why you put it in. Also TECHNICALLY speaking most pirate booty would have been non-shiny things like silk and grain. But, I mean, that’s just a technicality. Ignore me. <br />
<br />
In summery the episode had some great moments. Properly brilliant moments. And the joy of watching Amy and Rory yanking at ropes in the rain was not dampened by their dodgy technique. It was very Doctor Who. And there were pirates. I was never going to NOT like it was I?<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkud75Vx7R1qi1a33o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="147" src="http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkud75Vx7R1qi1a33o1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yes I found this by Googling 'Doctor Who series 6 eye patch woman.'</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<b>THEORY ALERT!</b><br />
You know the space-punk-eye-patch-women? The one in the hole in the door and the barrel? Following me? Excellent.<br />
Here’s my theory- I think she’s got something to do with the pregnancy.<br />
“Relax. You’re doing fine.”<br />
You know what that sounds like? That sounds like a midwife. Also the whiteness is very hospital.<br />
Don’t get me wrong. I don’t really think that series 6 is basically Amy dreaming while in labour on account of the space drugs. That was be jump the shark material. No, no, no. But I do think there’s something wibbley and timey going on.Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-34233480431263373962011-05-08T13:05:00.002+10:002011-05-26T19:36:22.836+10:00TARDIS PIE<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNHLH5cnYfamG6reFcxIaBrDX1XKj3SwI4G_SnUpiKS4FD-S2rPqSNOyKvCfU4arrniiFmZ30ddkpvR6WKhHJzU42F_F053kmTMjBXZbxuCCl7IPDW4vIvB4Pmc7bNpYcj35kYgogkKEo/s1600/tardis+pie+023.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNHLH5cnYfamG6reFcxIaBrDX1XKj3SwI4G_SnUpiKS4FD-S2rPqSNOyKvCfU4arrniiFmZ30ddkpvR6WKhHJzU42F_F053kmTMjBXZbxuCCl7IPDW4vIvB4Pmc7bNpYcj35kYgogkKEo/s320/tardis+pie+023.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">TARDIS PIE!!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">If fish fingers and custard aren’t your thing, this is the perfect Doctor Who night fare. It’s a pie. In the shape of the TARDIS. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Tastier on the inside.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">The times in this recipe are designed to ensure you have finished dinner by about 7:25 (weather time on the ABC). I know that’s anal but I can’t eat and watch Doctor Who. That would involve taking my eyes off the screen. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I haven’t included amounts but the pie I made (using a full sheet of pastry and about two fistfuls of meat) made a pie big enough for two. Or for leftovers. Depending how many friends you have.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>INGREDIENTS</b> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Meat (I used pre-cut casserole steak)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Onion</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Slow cooker recipe base or stuff to make gravy</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">A little water</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Olive oil (to cook with and grease pan)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Frozen short crust pastry</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZB7E4siECn6625gXPyxfpTMzyq2ndFvZK4EV753KgVaTDStvi09Rfy_pmfKp74HMROPsut29OjTZXVkdbFrtmQIjwaOKy1Ga6KTjl83-3oiNwf_KMfnLGuc_mRBdkvF9TD9zMkRBnG5c/s1600/tardis+pie+011.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZB7E4siECn6625gXPyxfpTMzyq2ndFvZK4EV753KgVaTDStvi09Rfy_pmfKp74HMROPsut29OjTZXVkdbFrtmQIjwaOKy1Ga6KTjl83-3oiNwf_KMfnLGuc_mRBdkvF9TD9zMkRBnG5c/s320/tardis+pie+011.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Apply fez to head. Not pie. That would soil the fez.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>BEFORE YOU START-</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">1- Apply fez. Due to the scarcity of this ingredient, this step is optional. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">2- The recommended soundtrack for this exercise is Chameleon Circuit’s album. Although we will also accept the soundtrack to Series 5. </div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0VoZ6TLVJ9Qjy4LLxOFEsMuJCOblypIut_DVPHkeh9k6bizoT9cXri_GlN7zewAhBuqKMUzme9WMvQIpXuLhs1M-UM8PTvGr10LkzAMr2DYW7QggCraFo5LwrhAT4P2agPV5qW-I8FoQ/s1600/tardis+pie+007.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0VoZ6TLVJ9Qjy4LLxOFEsMuJCOblypIut_DVPHkeh9k6bizoT9cXri_GlN7zewAhBuqKMUzme9WMvQIpXuLhs1M-UM8PTvGr10LkzAMr2DYW7QggCraFo5LwrhAT4P2agPV5qW-I8FoQ/s320/tardis+pie+007.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">If you don't have the Chameleon Circuit album- BUY IT.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>T MINUS FIVE HOURS</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">1- Chop onion into smallish pieces. Cook until translucent.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">2- Add meat and brown.</div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOhYql5k0F7H-mbmtrS_VRS2xbaKzedyz7XHCqRCioqaFXGvARkxTV2S39d3t4_Tp2ghwAa0PQZ5s8x6uhjrRJWPDHnqZR25Ug68ddfHiJyqlX7K8xrrHH6CwlNPK1ii0C5K1oa6MIRlg/s1600/tardis+pie+003.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOhYql5k0F7H-mbmtrS_VRS2xbaKzedyz7XHCqRCioqaFXGvARkxTV2S39d3t4_Tp2ghwAa0PQZ5s8x6uhjrRJWPDHnqZR25Ug68ddfHiJyqlX7K8xrrHH6CwlNPK1ii0C5K1oa6MIRlg/s320/tardis+pie+003.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Attractive cooking picture.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">3- Add slow cooker recipe base and the water (not too much! You want it thick). Stir through. Add whatever appropriate herbs and spices you happen to have to hand. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">(I’m sure there are more complicated ways to make the gravy part.)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">4- Transfer mixture into slow cooker OR turn to low and put the lid on. </div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikAzkIwSVk_xpWTKmglBnTD_YCCDVTT7r4bNnOKTXGC5j7XtCUqGyKC5VIlEN3E1zCSO13J8CTi4vcLNfgVyGn6PxXaXgfkaz2NRl3Qh5BCw9ydeWaZi8Nk9YKJ_0dx5ecbbU7N8A9QCk/s1600/tardis+pie+005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikAzkIwSVk_xpWTKmglBnTD_YCCDVTT7r4bNnOKTXGC5j7XtCUqGyKC5VIlEN3E1zCSO13J8CTi4vcLNfgVyGn6PxXaXgfkaz2NRl3Qh5BCw9ydeWaZi8Nk9YKJ_0dx5ecbbU7N8A9QCk/s320/tardis+pie+005.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Exact brand of recipe base unconfirmed. It was pretty good though.</td></tr>
</tbody></table> 5- Allow to cook for several hours. If you’re using a pan you’ll need to stir it.<br />
<br />
<div><div style="text-align: center;"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvXpAP7o-M1qgiEW6g2fTvHjOVctTOwzXCL6m4zvD7W9UNjbZX3CtcZzvRaUm6-7_irtzb5k6ytZvZ3Zwopy0GjEHYvcuZT3DaEqc68elTXzf6UN5x3C73t5GKiZeiTCNfg4AtgJ3fW4E/s1600/tardis+pie+009.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvXpAP7o-M1qgiEW6g2fTvHjOVctTOwzXCL6m4zvD7W9UNjbZX3CtcZzvRaUm6-7_irtzb5k6ytZvZ3Zwopy0GjEHYvcuZT3DaEqc68elTXzf6UN5x3C73t5GKiZeiTCNfg4AtgJ3fW4E/s320/tardis+pie+009.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">That's right. I have a tiny 70's slow cooker. Its ok to be jealous.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>T MINUS TWO AND A HALF HOURS</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">1- Get pastry out of the freezer.<br />
<br />
</div></div><div style="text-align: center;"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKT8VdngKDmEPI2H4AqMG-IZP4lsfbio9VQ8S7mTB5dIV9PpGsS08AOusY2L_Lho8F6lY4a5sWI6qX9uLc0gd2v6PZmWSzbBGTccpEfDHu8CohJZvreM1Gi2FbEUJDcrBtE3SsJvI-rZQ/s1600/tardis+pie+014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKT8VdngKDmEPI2H4AqMG-IZP4lsfbio9VQ8S7mTB5dIV9PpGsS08AOusY2L_Lho8F6lY4a5sWI6qX9uLc0gd2v6PZmWSzbBGTccpEfDHu8CohJZvreM1Gi2FbEUJDcrBtE3SsJvI-rZQ/s320/tardis+pie+014.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Applications from food stylists welcome.</td></tr>
</tbody></table> <b>T MINUS TWO HOURS</b></div>1- Grease the dish or tray you plan to cook your pie on. Preheat the oven.<br />
2- Place a sheet of pastry in the centre of the tray.<br />
3- Spoon meat into the middle of the sheet, arranging it in a rectangular shape.<br />
4- Lift the pastry on the long sides of the rectangle into the middle. They should just cross over. Gently seal together.<br />
5- Lift the short sides inwards, sealing your pie.<br />
6- Gently flip the pie over. This is the most dangerous part because the hot meat makes the pastry kind of soggy. Just be very careful.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">7- Your pie should look something like the picture. Ie- nothing like a TARDIS. That’s ok, it should just have the vague shape at this stage.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7ktd11uo0U_4loBq1d9bX8JdP7RFj1aFJBFkY4DJS1YhvEr4Wj9GZRdSeWFyzB78blb3zR2FCJnyraSAsopy3MZd1pFjEeDDQqYsHytTUhSZ4otkxHbN7nXUsCVxhn1SqUw2lw5RDtjg/s1600/tardis+pie+015.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7ktd11uo0U_4loBq1d9bX8JdP7RFj1aFJBFkY4DJS1YhvEr4Wj9GZRdSeWFyzB78blb3zR2FCJnyraSAsopy3MZd1pFjEeDDQqYsHytTUhSZ4otkxHbN7nXUsCVxhn1SqUw2lw5RDtjg/s320/tardis+pie+015.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">DON'T PANIC! It'll look better in a sec.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">8- Cut a rectangle of pastry the same size and shape as the top of your ugly pie. Lay it over the top, gently press to adhere the two pieces (you can brush it with milk or something too, that'd help). </div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeJ7sgVIQ7spOVtAJ1tFXH5RxWvc9aP0Vo6Y1DaYaMg3_v_YwnF96pgqqLyxUCC-CADkEqc-8KrN8KTKsco8eRA2w7hJLbP8k-8l6goRmTvTJXL1a-cn5z4uuNgQ_tMASZwI5BckDZtk4/s1600/tardis+pie+016.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeJ7sgVIQ7spOVtAJ1tFXH5RxWvc9aP0Vo6Y1DaYaMg3_v_YwnF96pgqqLyxUCC-CADkEqc-8KrN8KTKsco8eRA2w7hJLbP8k-8l6goRmTvTJXL1a-cn5z4uuNgQ_tMASZwI5BckDZtk4/s320/tardis+pie+016.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">See?! Better!</td></tr>
</tbody></table> 9- Cut thin strips of pastry and use it to build up the exterior structure of the TARDIS<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivx5ynJFWDs8-eNHEps09qD4acXl71IdeiBM1FaXYHskQ88gLqfplsvq0X9eC-BFit8h_jVNBmwaymT4MbNBk4o8TUaaD88R1lYJ9kRtilFpqA_muY9OszV3oRIO-zh7EmHFu-Vs5gnlc/s1600/tardis+pie+017.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivx5ynJFWDs8-eNHEps09qD4acXl71IdeiBM1FaXYHskQ88gLqfplsvq0X9eC-BFit8h_jVNBmwaymT4MbNBk4o8TUaaD88R1lYJ9kRtilFpqA_muY9OszV3oRIO-zh7EmHFu-Vs5gnlc/s320/tardis+pie+017.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">If you can't do this from memory... it is very unlikely that you would want to make a TARDIS pie.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">10- Don’t forget to add a door handle and a little panel for the “Free for use of Public” message. Using a toothpick or fork draw little scribbles on the tiny square to represent the writing. DO NOT try and write the message out. Just recite it to someone nearby instead. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">11- Cut a slightly thicker strip and, using your tooth pick, write POLICE BOX (again resist the urge to fit PUBLIC CALL in there). Stick this to the top. </div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzjtvMF9WS3f_FFbALuhVHrMOjvnTk1U_Ebq3FXidSfqQBc7Mbziv-7VtXuFOFu4F-ny0QgFUNnHawiK2xorOlZACGnXN5PjDh2I6xVMdjEm4KCgMmo2Y7xuNDlAkrAFD_zlCeAI3wnmQ/s1600/tardis+pie+018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzjtvMF9WS3f_FFbALuhVHrMOjvnTk1U_Ebq3FXidSfqQBc7Mbziv-7VtXuFOFu4F-ny0QgFUNnHawiK2xorOlZACGnXN5PjDh2I6xVMdjEm4KCgMmo2Y7xuNDlAkrAFD_zlCeAI3wnmQ/s320/tardis+pie+018.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">12- You can add a light using a little fold of pastry but they tend to fall off or flatten during cooking.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">13- Brush whole pie with milk or spray with oil or something of that kind. </div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbbcTGTPWj4qrHjBWUjhhycv-5RD1oBiclBNc15ZDre3xEhzWc2kmnhSk-TuG9eQwQQPSeE85lw9bZBmjEWE_omlc8XMgQpaEa_nBi4iSHhY_X-gYHveoj17Kh67-G6e6-UrzU36zJt5c/s1600/tardis+pie+021.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbbcTGTPWj4qrHjBWUjhhycv-5RD1oBiclBNc15ZDre3xEhzWc2kmnhSk-TuG9eQwQQPSeE85lw9bZBmjEWE_omlc8XMgQpaEa_nBi4iSHhY_X-gYHveoj17Kh67-G6e6-UrzU36zJt5c/s320/tardis+pie+021.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"> <b>T MINUS ONE AND A HALF HOURS</b></div>1- Put your pie in the oven. Depending on the oven and the size of the pie, it should take about forty-five minutes to cook.<br />
2- Let cool slightly before serving.<br />
<div><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7eZDwTu6ueUpgGGeNAgk1b81rP-42wuq1ATI2CukzHiXG_4uSc4MDaorBXRwuPziXdZAdOjjO_AzU-Hf2bh8PxLT4krxXmVR6Q7D47KMpe4MCRzixxG7TkxgBXhp6qhqbmh9mJ2G_Dcg/s1600/tardis+pie+022.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7eZDwTu6ueUpgGGeNAgk1b81rP-42wuq1ATI2CukzHiXG_4uSc4MDaorBXRwuPziXdZAdOjjO_AzU-Hf2bh8PxLT4krxXmVR6Q7D47KMpe4MCRzixxG7TkxgBXhp6qhqbmh9mJ2G_Dcg/s320/tardis+pie+022.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>T MINUS THIRTY MINUTES</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">1- Turn on the television to the ABC News. This is mainly to ensure that everyone in the vicinity is absolutely aware you have the television bagsed. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">2- Prepare any vegetable you plan to eat with your pie. They are recommended for nutritional balance.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">3- Plate up your pie. This involves using a spatula to put it on a plate.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">4- Eat pie while watching the news. Its educational AND you won’t miss the start. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">5- Om nom nom nom. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">So there you have it. TARDIS pie. The closest you can get to transdimentional baking. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>PLEASE NOTE- If you make this recipe you are obliged to send me a picture.</i></div>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-79386192587411048882011-05-01T22:26:00.001+10:002011-05-01T22:27:05.942+10:00The Impossible Astronaut<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"> <a href="http://www.goddesssophiawalker.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/The-Impossible-Astronaut-600x401.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://www.goddesssophiawalker.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/The-Impossible-Astronaut-600x401.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Lets cut to the chase shall we?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I was…kind of disappointed. Not because it was bad! No. There was wonderful jokes and spine tingling characterisation<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">1</span>. There was dialogue to die for and Doctor by the bucket loud. The Silence (or Silents or whatever, hoping they’re going to clear that little homophone discrepancy up for us soon) are sleep-with-the-lights-on terrifying<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">2</span>. And I am oh so looking forward to Jim the Fish and his dam<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">3</span>. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">But what I wanted was w<a href="http://a-beginners-guide.blogspot.com/2010/12/christmas-carol.html">arm honey and magic</a>. And warm honey and magic that this was not<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">4</span>. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">The Impossible Astronaut was way more ’There are Crocodiles<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">5</span>’ than ’The Eleventh Hour.’ It wasn’t at all what I was expecting. From the first two seconds and the French man shoe buckles it wasn’t what I was expecting. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Obviously that isn’t a bad thing but its also kind of odd. Its like when you put something in your mouth that you expect to be sweet but it turns out to be kind of cold and salty. You know what I mean? Your brain just can’t quite deal with the surprise and so it freaks out a little bit. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Watching it last night it honestly felt like a dream<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">6</span>. Admittedly that was, at least in part, because we watched it in the wee early hours of the morning. But it was more than that. Like a dream it leapt all over the place and went too quickly. I was confused and more than a little disorientated. It seemed to make some kind of sense at the time but not a kind of sense I could really grasp. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">The Doctor’s sudden and shocking death didn’t really affect me. Like when something really serious happens in a dream but you can’t react. Like when someone gets killed and you know you should cry but there’s no emotion there. That moment should have been punch in the gut material. But it wasn’t. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I have no doubt the Moff will pull this off.<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">7</span> He’s going to pull it off in ways I can’t even begin to imagine but right now…I’m not really sure how I feel about it. I’m all for delayed gratification but can’t we have some honey and magic as well? </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">1- Yes, spine tingling characterisation. Like as in so good it gave me chills. Shut up. It makes sense. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">2- Assuming of course you weren’t already sleeping with the lights on for fear of Vashtaverada. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">3-Moff has sacrificed the right to make throw away references during diary checks. Diary checks are established plot points now. Its his own fault.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">4-My life could do with a little more warm honey and magic. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">5-Does anyone actually get my Press Gang references? I’m not going to stop making them or anything, just curious. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">6- Like those dreams that are just an imaginary episode of Doctor Who? Everyone dreams whole episodes of Doctor Who right?</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">7- I know he will because Moffat is God and Moffat knows all. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">PS- I have the ability to delete comments. I shall use this ability on both spoilers and smug ‘one episode ahead’ remarks. You have been warned. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">PPS- Also- that annoying ‘my name is Amelia Pond’ bullshit before the credits?! WHAT WAS THAT?! I felt like I was having my intelligence raped. Or at least seriously insulted. If that was just for the sake of the bloody Americans they can damn well catch up on the last 50 years* of Doctor Who like everyone else in the known world had to. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">*So its not QUITE 50 years yet. Close enough. </span></div>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1749400184125876239.post-66378859383255416812011-04-28T12:12:00.003+10:002011-04-28T12:21:45.980+10:00The Campaign for Real Time<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig9xAVdqaahOcKt9ZlKKHOHMmBCijXVn0fo3-aO4l9eVWKxLMhn6TKKF39L65H2QIG50aytjhx8_IvZmcdDPsHfi-FoxAKneo4rD2uoNh7iK0f5_IIIuO_K_Mum-CRW1_yfuuOxkxfOtE/s1600/DoctorWho4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig9xAVdqaahOcKt9ZlKKHOHMmBCijXVn0fo3-aO4l9eVWKxLMhn6TKKF39L65H2QIG50aytjhx8_IvZmcdDPsHfi-FoxAKneo4rD2uoNh7iK0f5_IIIuO_K_Mum-CRW1_yfuuOxkxfOtE/s320/DoctorWho4.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
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</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><b>What? Real Time? What are you talking about?</b></span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When you sit down at a scheduled time to watch a specific television program you are watching it in Real Time. So for example watching Doctor Who this Saturday at 7:30 on ABC would be watching it in Real Time. Watching it afterwards using a recording device or on iView is Catching Up. Watching it online or via a torrent in the gap between the BBC release and the Australian air date is Cheating.</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And you invented these terms did you?</span></b></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Probably not. These just happen to be the words I use to describe things. Real Time has a bit in common with the Campaign for Real Time (see The Hitchhiker Guide to the Galaxy Tertiary Phrase or Life, The Universe and Everything). Both are threatened by impatient people with little respect for culture.</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Hang on. You're getting a bit worked up aren't you?</span></b></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Yes. I probably am. This is one of those stupid things that I get stupidly angry about. I think that television, especially really good television, deserved a degree of respect. And that means making time out of your day to watch it. That means arriving in front of the television five minutes early so as not to miss the start. That means watching it right to the end without the ability to pause it. It means watching in proper high definition quality instead of a dodgy pixelated online version. </span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So you've saying you've never pirated anything in your life are you, Miss High and Mighty?</span></b></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I didn't say that. My piracy habits have actually increased lately but I use them only as a last resort. If a show has been ridiculously treated by a network so that no sane person would be able to watch it the proper way I might, Cheat. Or if something isn't available in Australia and shows no signs of being aired here, I'll Cheat. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Its not piracy I have a problem with per-say, its impatience. Its pirating something totally unnecessarily. We only have to wait a week to see Doctor Who this year. ONE WEEK. Surely you can hold out that long?</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So we're really talking about the new series of Doctor Who are we?</span></b></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'll be honest. Yes, yes we are. </span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I still don't understand what the big deal is? Other people Cheating doesn't affect you?</span></b></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">No. Technically it doesn't. But one of my absolute favourite things about television is talking about it. I love long in-depth discussions of minor plot points. I love speculation and pointless in jokes. I love the discussions we have in the comments of this blog. </span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And Cheating ruins all that. If you've already watched Day of the Moon when I write about The Impossible Astronaut that post becomes void for you. You'll read it knowing what happens next and only be able to make smug "Ah! Wait and see!" type comments. And those are no fun at all. </span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But what about spoilers? Surely waiting to see it on TV will mean you've already had the whole episode ruined anyway? Half the world will have already seen it.</span></b></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This is a risk. But I'm making precautions. I've gone into self-imposed spoiler exile. That means no Tumblr for a whole month. It means Matt Smith's socks go without their dedicated online cyclopaedia. Google Reader will slowly fill with reviews and comments and articles from places I usually love reading. I might go through and read them all later. I might not. </span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And yes, this means I am cut off from all the other fans across the world. It means I have to engage with the episodes away from the internet. It means I have to talk to real people about it. And that's why Cheating sucks so bad. It means I can't talk to anyone because everyone's an episode ahead. So I have to talk to myself about it. And that's no fun at all.</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>I have a confession to make. I've already Cheated. You've made me feel kind of bad about it.</b> </span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That's ok. You're only human. And honestly it's not like I'm not tempted. I'm a little bit cross about the whole thing myself. EVERYONE is getting it before us. Everyone. And that isn't fair, I know. But look how far we've come. Australia used to be about ten weeks behind the UK air date. With any luck, pretty soon, we won't have this problem at all.</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You can still stop you know. It won't be easy. But come Saturday you can refrain from going online and watching the next episode. Watch the ABC instead, relive what you watched online in glorious technicolur. And then hold your breath for a week. Let the excitement build even more. Talk about it. Rave about it. Speculate about it. Next Saturday, when the second episode goes it air, make an occasion of it. Make TARDIS pie (I'm going to do some recipe trials and bring you a tested version very soon) wear a fez or a bowtie or your Doctor Who shirt. Then come and talk to me about how awesome it was. We can formulate stupid theories about the significance of red lights together. Doesn't that sound fun?</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Has anyone ever told you you're a bit weird?</span></b></div><div style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They never really stop. </span></div>Alexandra Neillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15343349111078389197noreply@blogger.com3